Find the Light
by redheadclover
Summary: Not only is she a Captain of the Resistance and a pilot, but she's also the daughter of Hans Solo and General Leia Organa. With her feelings for a certain pilot named Poe, an inner pull towards The Force, and a past that has been blocked in her mind, Neyli Organa-Solo has an adventure waiting for her as she helps the Resistance in the battle against the First Order. POE X OC
1. Chapter 1

**Planet D'Qar**

 **Resistance Base**

"Captain on deck," I walked into the meeting room where a group of resistance officers, standing at attention as soon as I was entering the room, the noise was once again quiet as the monitor was in the middle and the current plans were drawn up and ready for me to see and approve on.

"What's the report?" I asked, seeing one of the other officers coming over to hand me some of the papers that they had presented to me.

"We lost more men with the counterattack against the TIE fighters," He explained to me, having me read the numbers and see the damage there.

"We lost, at least, four other pilots to the recent attack against the First Order," I said out loud from reading the paper and seeing the names there that we lost the battle.

"We need more men, Captain," The officer almost pleading with me as I looked over at him, watching him point to the monitor in front of us and the number of pilots we have left that were still alive on the left and those we lost on the right, "If we don't do something now, we could lose all of our assault fleet that we would need in the future."

"We cannot forget those we still have, Lieutenant," I reminded him, walking around the circular table a bit more to see the pilots that we still have a bit more closely on the monitor, "The ones we still have been in our fleet for plenty of years and through plenty of battles."

"Do we rely on our seasoned pilots, no matter how many we still have?" He asked me, having me still keep my composure there and nod my head at him without missing a beat.

"I would rather rely on our pilots who have more quality in their flying technique than try to recruit reckless pilots who do have the leadership skills instilled in them to bring us to victory," I explained to him clammily as I placed my hands on the table and leaned against it slightly,"With these pilots, and the plenty of other seasoned officers that we do have, we know what kind of pilots we need in order to succeed against the First Order. I hope that the next time we recruit more pilots, that we don't make the same mistakes as before," It was almost a warning to them all right now and they said nothing for a moment or two before the doors opened again, all of us looking and seeing it was none other than our general.

General Leia Organa.

"Captain Neyli is right," She said to the group of officers as she walked over to my side and looked at the monitors, "We must look at the quality of our pilots and their determination in those fights, not the number that we have. We may have a low count wit hour pilots, but that is not going to stop us from our mission of peace in the galaxy and our fight against the First Order, understood?" She asked the group, all of them nodding in agreement and having me look over at her, seeing her eye me now as she moved passed me.

"Meet me in my office," She said to me as she passed by me, having me watch her move over to where her office was and close the door behind her. I had to sigh, thinking that I once again did something wrong and it made me look back at the files in my papers, the officers were watching me now for any other further command.

"Make sure the supplies are reloaded for another mission. get the X-Wings fixed up and check on the droids for any other further repair," I explained to them, seeing them all nod in agreement and then having me leave the papers there on the table for the officer to grab. It wasn't that I didn't look forward to meeting with General Organa, I have learned plenty under her command. it was just a matter of me not knowing what she wanted to talk to me about and what she had to say to me.

"Come on in, Captain," I opened and closed the door behind me, finding myself in General Organa's office and she was standing right behind her desk, arms crossed in front of her and she looked a bit softer at me than she did in front of the other officers some moment ago. Her room was filled with piles of papers, maps of other constellations and the planets that she was keeping an eye on. I could even see some of her family pictrues, tucked away on the bookshlevs beind her and around the room. Every once in awhile I would look at those pictures and see who was in them. In the corner of the room, dusting away at some of the trinkets there on the wall, was C3PO, a trusty robot that worked for General Leia.

"Oh, Hello Captain! Pleasure to see you again!" he said to me in his chipper yet robotic voice. I smiled at him as General Leia finally spoke up.

"Have you heard from you father? Has he made any kind of contact with you recently?" She asked me, her voice a bit on the lower side but gentle as I shook my head.

"No, ma'am," I replied back to her, seeing her think to hers for a moment before almost looking like she was about to crumple down a bit.

"He's never not contacted back here to me for this long period of time," She explained, "I just don't know here he is."

"You have no way of tracking him?" I asked in curiosity, seeing her shake her head.

"If I know your father as well as I do, he knows how to get under the radar so no one can find him, not even the First Order," she explained back calmly now as I could see she was about to be upset about it, "But then again, your father was always reckless, for the type of man that he is."

"I hope that I don't have that within myself, ma'am," I said, almost in trying to make it a lighter manner of conversation and she grinned at me then, hearing the joke I had on my lips.

"You don't, thankfully. Though you do have a bit of the adventurousness that he would always have within him, something that I have and always will admire,"

"Thank you, ma'am." I thanked her, feeling a bit lighter about what she said about my father and I shifted a bit in my spot with my hands behind my back and my eyes straight forward.

"You have been doing profoundly well for the Resistance here, being a good Captain for the others to follow and admire, I could be prouder than you," She said wholeheartedly and a small smile on her face, standing now right in front of me and having me look down at her a bit since I had my height on my side.

"I have a good General to look after and take notes from," I voiced to her, seeing her tilt her head to the side now as she then chuckled and placed both of her hands on my upper arms now, almost as if she was bringing me back to earth.

"You know, you don't have to call me General all the time, Neyli," She reminded me, having me roll my eyes at her and give her a small smile.

"I don't think it would be wise to call you mother in front of the men," I countered, seeing her grin even more and we both hugged there in her office. I could hear her sigh against my shoulder then, having me feel how she was holding me there and she had plenty weighing on her shoulders since she was leading this resistance how all by herself. Hell, she could do it, but she was still only one person, and I was still there trying to help her in any way that I could.

"We'll find him, mom," I reassured her now in a hushed manner, "Dad will come home soon."

He had to come home soon.

* * *

 **Four years earlier**

"But why can't I, at least, help and fly one of those fighters? Don't you want me to help out?" I was having another infamous fight with both of my mother and father, both of whom were not looking too pleased on my end as we were in my mom's office now and they were not pleased as punch when I took one of the X-Wing vehicles to help in a mission that was needed. But then again, since I was the daughter of a General and a war hero, there was apparently more expected to me.

"You are not authorized to be flying on of those X-Wings, especially in the current time of frame that we are in. It is too dangerous for you to be flying out there with the rest of the pilots." My mother reasoned with me, my father right behind her as some kind of support, having me huff and place my hands on my hips. My hair, brown and red in color, was shortly chopped then and framing my round face and my brown eyes, apparently the ones I inherited from my mother were giving them cold stares.

"I am a soldier here and a pilot, aren't I?" I asked her back since I thought she would forget about my ranking as a pilot there at the base.

"You are, but you're not ready for something as dangerous as this mission that they are about to go into. You are going to be staying here on the ground until you can prove to me that you are ready to fly with the boys up there and hold your own ground," My mother explained to me, having me swallow my own need to talk about to her since she was not only my mother but also my boss. I knew she was going to treat me like the others, I wanted her too. She was not going to treat me different because I was her child, but then again I thought it would be the same this time so I can join the boys. I guess not. I even looked at my father for some kind of support, but I got nothing from his face as I noted my head at the both of them.

"My apologies," I replied to them, seeing my mother nod at me and I knew that was my cue to leave. I walked out the door, closing it behind me and sighing in defeat then. Pilots were talking left and right, talking to each other like it was a normal day there at the hanger. It was typical to brethe in the air fumes within the area of the hanger, pipes were all over the place along the top of the walkways and the sides, it was my home afterall. But once again I was having a power struggle. I really want do go and fly out on the X-Wings and fulfill my duty, but I also felt like I was being held back by my own mother.

"Did you think it would be easy for us to have her not fly?" My father asked my mother under a mutter in his breath.

"Han, don't start," My mother warned him.

"Come on, Leia. It was bad enough that we had to take the lightsaber away from her, but now her flying?" He asked her, having me feel a bit uneasy again from a recent memory of my childhood.

"It's too risky for her right now, it's not like when she started piloting. Not with what's going on with the First Order," My mother said to him in a careful way, having em finally move away from the door now and get over to where my living quarters. I didn't want to think about it anymore, it was just draining me and having me think that I was not going to get anywhere.

* * *

My own living quarter was small enough for me, a snug bed in the corner and a desk at the foot of it near the wall, gadgets and wires all over the top and pouring out over the sides of the desk and some X-Wing schematics on the walls pinned there. All of the pilots, when starting out, would have a living quarters like this until they get promoted or placed in a new facility. Mine was tucked away in the back, away from the front as closest as possible since I was more prone to have my alone time compared to the other pilots.

I liked it enough, the tight quarters there and how it felt so snug within my own area. Some of the other pilots would think that I would have a high rolling like a place, on a count of who my mother was, but I refused. I wanted it like the rest of the men, and I wanted it to be an equal playing field.

Stripping off my combat jacket, I plopped down at the desk in the chair, running my fingers in my hair and trying to find my peace again. I had a family picture propped on my wall, one of my whole family when I was a little girl out one the planet Naboo and posing at one of the waterfalls that I loved. I was so small then, being held in my father's arms and we were giggling about something. It was one of those moments, many moments of course, that I really wondered if I made the right choice of being a pilot under my mother, was it really worth it? I had to think it was since I knew about the good side of the galaxy more than the bad.

A sudden beep was heard, along with a few sounds of a droid coming in from outside in the hallway. I grinned, knowing who that was and I looked behind me, a small droid of white and orange popping his head in and buzzing at me excitedly.

BB-8

"Hello you," I said to him as he rolled into my room. A few clicks and swirls were heard.

"No, I did not have a fight with my parents if that's what you're wondering," I replied, seeing him gurgle at me a few more times before I heard a knock at the door. I grinned, not looking up at who it was since I knew who it was. There would be only one person that would ever knock at my door since others would either just walk in or call out before walking in.

"Hello Poe," I said in a smile, looking up at Poe Dameron, one of the best pilots there was at the base and for the Resistance. He was a bit of a hero, acording the rest of the pilots, and yet he's been flying the same amount of time as I have been flying. I was a bit younger than him, but he was flying like he's a seasoned veteran of the trade for over 30 years. He was reckless, loyal to a fault, and not to mention, a great friend for someone to have. So, it was fair that we were just becoming closer as friends.

"How do you know it's me?" He asked me in a cocky grin, having me try and avoid the fact that I was feeling a bit warm all of from that one smile that he had. That was another thing that I never thought would happen to me, having feelings for the pilot. Sure, he was handsome and some of the other women on the base were caught looking at him for a bit too long when he would walk by, and the way he would walk like he was a Jedi on water was another thing. But to me, it was his kindness. There was not one person whom he was mean or cold hearted too, nor was he cocky enough to be snarked at by others. No, he was well liked young man there on the base.

"You're the only person that would ever knock to come and see me," I reminded him, seeing him think about it for a moment to himself and he nodded in agreement. BB-8 beeped again at me, moving my attention from Poe to his droid.

"What's broken?" I asked BB-8 now, Poe moving more into the room.

"There's a busted wire there in his hard wire and I don't think the mechanics can do a thing about it, and since you're pretty good with the droids and the hard wire, I figured you would take a look at him?" Poe asked in a suggestion, having me roll my eyes and hop off my chair to get down and sit Indian style in front of BB-8.

"Show me where it hurts," I joked with BB-8, seeing him roll a bit at an area where I could see was a bit rough and I started to get to work there. I worked on droids here and there when I was here on the base, it made me happy to just work through the droids and get my mind back in ease. I got pretty good at it, some of the pilots would bring me their doirs if soemthing was too complicated for them to fix. I got in trouble once or twice with my mother because of the mechancis were complaining I was steaing thier customers and thier droids. BB-8 was a good droid to work on, a quirky one at that. Of course he would belong to Poe, it made perfect sense.

"I heard you got grounded from flying with us tomorrow," Poe was making small talk, standing and leaning against the wall with his hands crossed in front of him, tilting his head at me.

"Already I'm being talk about with the others?" I asked back to him, hearing him snicker a bit.

"You are the general's daughter, so they can't help but talk," Poe reasoned with me now as I grinned widely, getting some wires out of the way in BB-8 for me to see the real problem.

"Yeah well, the general does not want me to go out on this mission," I explained as I snapped another piece of equipment in place.

"You're a good pilot," Poe said in a light manner.

"Thanks, but that won't convince her," I replied, getting the last bit down with BB-8 and hearing him whizz in glee. I had to chuckle, leave it to BB-8 to have it light in such an award conversation.

"You're quite welcome, and no more being a rebellious droid. Your master needs you," I reminded BB-8 then and he beeped right back at me in agreement. I got up from the sitting position I was in, standing in front of Poe and cracking my knuckles in the process, "Where are they making you head out on the mission coming up?"

"A distant planet for some information rounding, basic protocol. Nothing big involving The First Order yet," He said to me in a nonchalant tone.

"That's good," I voiced back to him.

"Eh, I think they would have gotten a better job for me to do," he commented, having me shake my head and how he really wasn't looking forward to it.

"Hey, at least you get to go fly," I reminded him, "You're the best one here anyhow." The way he grinned at me, it could make any other girl look at him and want to melt to the floor. I had to admit, he had me a bit too. It was another thing that I had to battle myself with, my feelings for the pilot and how I never saw myself in the same level playing field as him.

"Thanks, Neyli," He thanked me, sounded so sincere about it.

"You're welcome, Poe," I replied, our eyes still locking for a moment or two before BB-8 slammed into Poe then and Poe yelped out in the quick pain.

"Okay, Okay we'll go!" He said in a huff now as BB-8 rolled out of my room then. Poe followed suit with me grinning from their playful banter and he then turned to looked at me one more time, "Thanks again for BB-8. We'll talk again for sure, right?"

"You got it, Poe." I said back to him, seeing him pause for another moment or two before I said one more thing to him, "May the Force be with you." he nodded to me then and then moved out of the room. It was a typical thing for me, to deny the feelings I had for another pilot and call them childish and silly.

How long was the denial going to be?


	2. Chapter 2

**Planet Naboo**

 **24 years ago**

" _Come on Neyli, come chase me!" Ben and I would run around in our home in Naboo, the cooling trees and the beautiful sun following us as we would run through the garden that was outside our home that we lived in. I missed that home, it was nice and tucked away from the city where our mother was serving for a short period of time as a politician and was in a meeting to talk with the current Queen. At the time, I didn't know what it was about since I was still too young to understand, but all I could understand was my beautiful home and my brother playing with me._

" _Not so fast, Ben!" I called out to him as he was turning and running in the garden._

" _You can keep up! You're faster than me!" He said over his shoulder at me now as we were now along a large grassy field near the many cliffs of Naboo. I could hear the distant waterfalls and the humming of the planet below us and the feel of the grass under my fingertips and palms. Everything was bright and illumianted for me, every color seemed to be thorwn at me from the flowers and the rays of the sun. Naboo was the stuff made of dreams._

 _I finally tagged my brother, seeing him chuckle and we both fell to the floor and almost toppled on one another in a heap. His hair, as dark as the night, somehow was shining brightly in the morning sun as my was lighter and more fuller of the warmth. The one thing we both had with each other, the one common thing that we both can rely on each other, as our chocolate eyes that we both inherited from our parents._

" _Young Masters! You must stay over here where we can see you or you shall certainly be lost!" Once again, our faithful robot who was tinted in gold and has such an authoritative voice there that was on the brink of nervousness as he trotted over to our area finally, his stiff arms were waving in such a frantic rate._

" _Master Ben and Master Neyli, your mother shall be worried sick if you don't come back very soon!" C3PO called out to us, the both of us popping our heads up from over the tall green grass!_

" _Where is mother?" I asked him as we both jogged over to CP3O._

" _She's back at your home, talking to one of the senators in a very important matter," he replied to us now as Ben wipe the dust off his pants and grinned._

" _Come on then, I don't want us to get in too much trouble with mom," Ben said to me, having the three of us walking together back to our home. I looked back at the cliffs once more, seeing the evergreens and the distant capital city and it's glorious buildings and waterfalls there. I wished that I could stay there forever, the perfect place for us to live and to play as children._

" _The Republic is in need of aid of Naboo, thank goodness for the Queen to bring that aid when we need it the most," I could hear my mother talking to someone as my brother and I came over to the house over near the side door, the both of us seeing my mother there talking to someone else. Her hair was back in a typical udo of a braid, she was wearing a midblue dress attire that was silk and looked beautiful on her. It reminded me of the night sky when she wore it to speak to the Queen._

" _Young ones should not listen to such things, come on now," C3PO said to the both of us as he walked away over to our room to go down the wall, thinking we were following him. But Ben and I stayed behind, the curious children that we were wanting to hear what was going on, and thankfully C3PO did not check to see if we were following. We both looked around the corner, out of sight, and heard more of the conversation. Ben was higher up than me as I was on the bottom._

" _But that's not the only thing on my plate right now," our mother said in a low tone, "My brother is convinced that the children should be trained with him, along with the others that he's found that are force-sensitive."_

" _But they are still young aren't they?" another voice asked my mother now, "What does Han think?"_

" _Han is still on the fence with it, and they are a bit older than they should be, but my brother is getting a strong sense that they both need to train now than later," my mother sounded more grave about it bringing up my father and then my Uncle._

" _What's going on, Leia?" The second voice asked, a pause there hanging in the balance now as I was wondering what was making my mother sounded so sad and unsure of herself, something that was not normal for even my mother to experience,_

" _Luke was sensing a shift of The Force in the children," She said in a quiet manner now, having me hear Ben move a bit behind me since he was perched over me to hear what was going on, "He's more afraid of what is going on with Ben than Neyli. Ben's more….reckless according to Luke."_

" _He's a young boy, they have reckless tendencies," The other tried to reason with my mother._

" _No, he sees…his grandfather in him," I didn't know what to think of that then, hearing nothing behind me and having me look to see Ben. But he wasn't there, I watched him as he was walking down the hallway with his head bowed and fists at his side._

* * *

 **Planet D'Qar**

 **2 years ago**

I snapped awake from my dream, gasping for air and hoping that I could find it somewhere as that image still flashing in my head. Naboo, the bright sunlight and the tall green grass under my fingers, those vivid and bright colors that made me think of dreams and happier times. Once again it was one of those dreams and memories that were both hazy, almost out of my reach, and vivid and chaotic. Why was it so vivid and yet so blurry? Why were these dreams haunting me like I was experiencing it for the first time?

It was dark in my room, dark and almost glowing from my monitor on my desk, having me sit up completely and place my feet over the side onto the floor so I can feel the tile on the ground beneath my toes. It was another night of relentless dreams and memories I thought I lost and never found again, or were too good to be true. When it came to something like this, I would go out to my X-Wing and try to rethink those dreams out again, finding a familiar place that I knew was my safety net for times like this.

The hanger was quiet, my own X-Wing was the third one on the left and sitting there like the others in that dark hanger as I walked over with a lantern and notebook in hand, pencil behind my hear and my clothed jacket wrapped around me. The size of te hanher itself ws large enough to fit at least 50 X-Wings and a few more vehicles and vessals, high enough to look like a dome that could open in the middle if necessary. The cooling temperature of the hanger was inviting to me as I sat on one of the wings of my vehicle, my feet dangling in the air and my pencil already at work in the notebook as I was writing down every part of my dreams.

Ever since I was a teenager and my brother's death, I wourl write in the journal that Ben gave me on our 12th birthday. I loved that journal, seeing the smaller entires that I would place there and forgot about later. But now they were filled with dreams, what happened and who was there. It was better to have it on paper and fresh for me to read back later than to forget. Some nights were better than others, but these dreams were becoming more frequently than any other time before when I was younger. Why now?

At first, there was silence there in the hanger since I was the only one in there, but I then heard another round of beeping that made me look up from my notebook and see a droid coming over to my direction. I didn't see who it was at first, but I realized that it was my own droid that I would work with on my plane: Q4-Q2, or as how I would like to call him, Q2.

"You need to be back in your own barracks, Q2," I reminded him, my own little droid who was silver all over with some green accents here and there. He was a good droid, having me remember when I was first given him for my first flight and since then we were good friends. Q2 was very much loyal to me, never leaving my side until I asked him to. Q2 hummed a bit at me, beeping more or twice and then having me eye him.

"No, I will come back soon." I reminded him, hearing another round of whirling, "It's not like that at all. It's just another dream is all. And I shouldn't be telling you this any who."

"No, you should be talking to me about it," The voice was broken into the quiet of the hanger again, having myself look over as well as Q2 to see who it was. I knew who it was, the familiar voice that could calm any storm or any situation, both soothing and determined. It was Poe, walking into the hanger with his combat training gear that was loose on him and his walk was calm and collective.

"What are you doing out here all by yourself?" he asked me in a surprising manner, seeing me up high on my X-Wing and placing my notebook on my side there.

"Can't sleep," I replied to him as he walked over a bit closer to me and I heard a couple more rounds of wheezing and beeping from Q2, "You, off to bed before you get in trouble. I'll be fine on my own," Q2 beeped once more before rolling off back over to the living quarters, Poe grinding as he watched the droid roll away. Poe grinned and looked at me, pointing to the droid as he was swallowed into the darkness

"He looks out for you I take it?" he asked me in curiosity now and in a grin there too as he was near the ladder that would lead him up and over to me.

"As does BB-8 does for you," I replied back to him, seeing him nod in agreement, "As I recall that little unit of your is more prone to electrocute the pilots that are not in your favor."

"Hey! That was once and it was for a pure accident," he tried to reason with me, having me chuckle and how he was trying to defend his own droid. It was peaceful again between us, our friendship was still solid and kind enough. Poe then pointed to the ladder that was against my X-Wing, "Mind if I join you?"

"You're not going to go back to sleep?" I asked him as he shrugged his shoulder.

"I'm already awake, I don't see the point of trying to sleep again," He replied, having me reluctantly against some of the better judgment I had in my head finally nod and he started to climb the ladder like he's been doing this for years and years on end. Of course, he made it look so easy, he was Poe Dameron. Hell, Poe made walking on water look like Poe's been doing it since he was two years old.

He plopped down next to me now, grinning at me as I moved my own hair to the side and he looked around at the desolated hanger and the quiet was over us again.

"I've never been here in the hanger when it's this quiet before," He said out of the blue, looking around and almost looking like he didn't know what to do then.

"I like it from time to time," I explained, seeing him look over at me from the corner of my eye as I looked up at the open hanger doors, slightly ajar to show the night sky and the plenty of stars that were there, "I like to think out here, with no one around."

"It's kind of nice actually," He commented too, "Still, a bit odd to be out here alone."

"I never mind it at all really, I tend to come out here every once in awhile when I can't sleep," I explained, seeing him give me a questioning look from what I said to him.

"What can't you sleep?" he asked, sounding less of the jokester that he was and more genuine and concerning. I had to think about it, what I was going to say to him and how I was going to say it in order to not sound like an idiot or crazy.

"I've been having these weird dreams," I explained, pausing before I went on to see if he was going to be put off by it. So far, he was still interested from where I was seated and he was running to the hills yet, "The dreams are of my brother and me when we were little children,"

"I didn't know you had a brother," Poe said to me in a surprised manner but it was still hushed.

"I don't really talk about it since it's kind of a sore spot," I admitted, feel a bit and about it within my own chest, "But It's been happening more recently, and I don't know why."

"What was his name?" Poe asked me, having me think about my brother again for a moment and almost want to cry from how out of the blue how much I missed him.

"Ben, his name was Ben," I replied softly.

"Was?" He asked again, having me now feel a bit of lead on my tongue from what I was about to say next.

"He died when I was young," I replied back to him, hearing nothing from Poe for a moment or two before I wanted to say something else to get the conversation either moving or out of the way.

"I'm sorry I asked," he replied to me in almost a hurtful manner, "It wasn't my place."

"It's fine, Poe. Trust me, I've had good days and bad days about it," I explained to him calmly now as I swung my legs a bit and shuffled my hair a bit now with my fingers, "I just miss him, we were close when we were little."

"I don't have a brother," Poe said to me, having me look over at him as he was thinking about it to himself, "I wish I did, but I was an only child."

"Sounds like a hard life for you," I said in a joking manner, seeing him crack a grin at me as I was somehow poking a jab at him, "The perfect Poe Dameron has a hard knock life for himself."

"I'm not that perfect," He said in defense.

"I'm sure."

"I'm really not!" He said in a chuckle, "I'm cockier than anything."

"No way you're not," I said back to him, "You're kind, not cocky. If anyone is cocky here, it is definitely not you." I didn't know why I would say that to him, no matter how good of a friendship that we had and now I literally just told him about my deceased brother and how I had weird dreams. But then again he was still there talking to me and sitting next to me like we were friends who had plenty of years under our belts. I had a deep appreciation for him and how he was willing to pour into friendship, like this one with me though I still had no idea why. I wasn't really anyone special for someone like Poe to look at.

"You know, don't take this the wrong way, but you are honestly nothing like your mother," he commented to me with suck kinds there laced in his face and in his voice that it almost made me blush.

Hell, hearing something like that would brighten my whole day, and it was almost like a way of flirting.

* * *

 **Planet D'Qar**

 **Present Day**

I walked through the hanger in almost a fast walk than anything. This was the last thing that I needed, to deal with this and try to contain what I was feeling on the inside. He was going off on another mission, thanks to my mother, and It had something to do with finding my Uncle.

Luke Skywalker.

We've been trying to find him for years and years on end, not being able to find any clues that could lead us to him. He's been away from my family ever since I was a young girl, left without a trace behind him and it made my mother beyond nervous for her to find her twin brother. Now it was a result of Poe being assigned to go to the planet Jakku with an old ally that lived there. The ally apparently had something valuable to use for us to have and find my Uncle. I should be happy about it, but I wasn't.

Because Poe was going out there.

He was at the very edge of the hanger, BB-8 already in the X-Wing and beeping at Poe who was on the side of his X-Wing and checking one more piece of equipment there along the side. Poe shot a look at BB-8 when he buzzed at him about something.

"Don't worry, buddy. You heard what General Organa said, this is important to find Skywalker, and she chose us to do it!" Always the hopeful one to think of the positive in any kind of situation. It made me smile to think he was such a person, but then again I was still worried about his upcoming mission, no matter how many he's been on and how seasoned a veteran is. I was about to say something when BB-8 once again buzzed and whirled, pointing his antenna in my direction and Poe looked too. Damn BB-8 for giving me away at him and Poe grinned, walking over to me in his attire that he wore that day, pants, combat boots, his flight leather jacket and his pistol on his hip.

"I heard you're going out to Jakku today," I explained to him as he placed his hands on his hip.

"Just a routine run to find an old ally of General Organa," He explained to me, having me nod at him and see him look at me in hesitance a bit, like a weight was on him then, "I know it's importance to find Luke Skywalker and to better help the Resistance."

"And who better to go out on this mission then you, of course," I voiced back to him, having him look a bit more hesitant about it since I said in that manner. I didn't want to admit to him that I was a bit worried about him and that I cared about him far too much. I could tell he was seeing it in my face and he then took a few steps over to me, reaching over to grab my hand within his own. I was about to say something to him when our hands touched, fingers lacing there and having me feel the sudden heat that was about to come for of me and hit him from what I was feeling.

"It's a simple mission, Neyli. I'll be back before you know it," he said with such reassurance there that it would make me feel better if it was any other mission that he would be in. But this one seems more intense, because of how big this mission was, the search for my Uncle and how important he would be to help with the Resistance. It felt like he was having a hardy heavy weight on his shoulders, and my mother trusted him.

"It's not a simple mission, Poe," I reminded him in a low tone now, "This is very dangerous if something could happen to you, or if The First Order finds you trying to get to my Uncle…" I trailed off in a now around manner. Poe shook his head seeing the now set of fear on my face from what I was saying and he was squeezing our joint hands tighter than ever.

"Nothing is going to happen to me, you know I can handle myself and one of the best pilots here, it's going to be okay," He said to me in a softer way, and even though I was still feeling uneasy about it, I had to realize that he could handle himself, even with a serious big mission such as this one. I really wished I could hug him there, let him know what I was really feeling within that moment, but a simple hand hold was going to have to do at this moment. Was he thinking that same thing? At this point in our relationship, was this the one thing he could only do?

"I'll be back soon, I promise you Neyli. Okay?" he asked me, having me slowly nod my head and he gave me one of those very rare smiles that he would give me every once in awhile when we would be alone. I was no longer thinking like a Captain, but I was thinking as something else, a title I was both appreciated of and not able to call myself out in public.

"Be safe, for my sake, Poe," I said to him in my own softer manner.

"Of course, Captain," He grinned at me, having me eye him now.

"Don't start," I advised him, not wanting him dress me like that when I was having my own moment with him. But there he was, seeing him just smile back at me.

"I know what you meant, Neyli. I'll be safe," He said in his bold manner, having me nod at him and we finally released our joined hands. He would be back, I knew that for certain since he was such a good pilot to not come back.

I had to let him go.

* * *

 **Several Hours Later**

"What's the progress on Dameron?" I asked the officers as we were checking his locator that he had on for us to trace him. It was showing him on the planet Jakku, but it was something else that made my own blood turn cold and my heart almost break. We could see it there on the locator, the red lights coming on over and over all over the area and we knew what that meant, something I really didn't want to admit in front of the others.

"There appears to be an invasion of Storm Troopers from the First Order coming onto the planet, Captain," One of the officers explained to me now as she pulled up the map of the area to make it a little bigger. I could see all of the red dots moving around on the screen now and it was making em more grave.

"Captain, Poe just got captured by The First Order," I closed my eyes in defeat and I clutched the desk beneath me.

Poe was captured, and my heart was breaking.


	3. Chapter 3

**Planet D'Qar**

 **4 years ago**

"Go over those readings for me, again. Make sure you do it right this time," I was facing another schematic of the newest model of our X-Wing, another pilot training program and going over my rank there as some kind of test. I was doing the same testing as the others there, all of us around the round table there in the main hanger of our base to test our knowledge of the X-Wings that we would maybe be flying in the future. I was glad to get through the training of being a pilot with the others there, some of them were wondering why I was there if I was the daughter of Leia Organa, the infamous General. I was already getting some kind of reputation there for maybe moving up the ranks merely because of my surname, and I hoped that it wasn't the case at all. I wanted to work on my own and get my own hands dirty, not to rely on my family to excel.

"Fail, do it one more time before I dismiss you for the day," I could hear the officer two pilots down from me scolding another pilot for doing the readings wrong, having me look over my own work at a doubling rate. This was pushing me to do better, much better than before when I was just starting out as a trainee pilot.

"Well done," I looked over my shoulder, seeing the officer there looking at my work and a small smile on his lips, "You're going rather well with your work, pilot."

"Thank you, sir," I thanked him, seeing him nod at me as he moved on to the next pilot. The nice moment was chortled, however, because I could see from across the table, a couple of the other pilots looking right at me in a death glare and I knew they were trying to make me feel utterly terrible.

Great, just great.

* * *

"Must be great, being the Generals daughter and going through the ranks with ease," I heard behind me as I was waiting in line for my own food and my friend, Janco, was waiting right behind me, having me see him roll his eyes from hearing the soldier trying to whip me down once again. It was another routine, some punk of a pilot who was either fresh in the training, or really bold to try and be anywhere near me and lost losing an eye. I was trying to get used to it, no matter who many times I would be angry about it.

"I don't know about you, but I would think that being such a protege around here would be a blessnig since everything is handed to you on a silver platter," Another jab at me, having me feel Janco nudge me with his shoulder now with a hopeful smile on his face.

"Leave them, they don't know a thing about you, Neyli," Janco reassured me now with his kind tone as I got my food onto my plate, seeing an unfamiliar figure in front of me, maybe he was new to the program and I had no idea. But he was a bit taller than me, minding his own and I was about to introduce myself to him when the jokester said one more thing that did set me off.

"I could only wonder what kind of string that your own family pulled, sleeping with officers and such, or even just stealing junk to pay off your time here. What a great family she must have," Now, if I had one thing from either one of my parents, it was my sense of pride and my temper. I knew what it meant to be kind and what it mean to be respectful, but if I wasn't going to get it, then I wasn't to give it. This one pilot, a mere boy really in my own, was really going to push it with me. I placed my tray on the counter then, whirling around and moving Janco out of the way.

But the mysterious new pilot beat me to it.

"Hey, why don't you leave her alone?" he asked the jokester, the new pilot sounded so stern with him and yet his voice sound smooth and almost charismatic.

"Listen, Mr. New Guy, I don't think you should mess around with me, got it?" He asked the new friend in a cold tone now, jabbing him with a finger on his chest like he was about to push him away now. I still looked at the jerk, seeing him leer at the new man who was trying to defend me though we never met.

"You're right," The new guys said in a factorial tone, "Because if I did, I could really make you look very childish and almost like a walking specimen with no spine,"

"Listen, pretty boy…" The new guy was now getting threatened, and I felt like now was the right time to step in and do something about it. I had to think light on my feet then, wanting to have the two men separate with each other since I knew it was about to get ugly. So I did the one thing I thought I could do to make it better.

I clotheslined the guy.

Throwing out my arm like a heavy pole, I knocked it against his neck to blow out his breath from his lungs and have him fall back, ending his back in an awkward manner and his head slamming into the counter a bit, toppling to the floor in a heap. Everyone in the cafeteria heard and saw it, no one making a single move as his food was flying in the air and I was standing in front of the mysterious defender, whom too looked surprised from my actions. I leered down at the jokester, his friends who were still standing behind him looked at me with petrified eyes and backed away a bit.

"What the hell?" The defeated man grumbled a bit as he tried to get up.

"Get your manners in check before you decide to open your mouth again and back talk to a sergeant," I warned him in a low tone, "Be sure to never talk about my family while I'm in earshot, or I'll make you bleed next time," he said nothing as I said this, but giving me a cold look and the rest of the pilots in the large cafeteria were slowly going back to what they were doing. I grinned, seeing Janco move over to me to talk over my shoulder.

"Good job getting in trouble," he whispered.

"The guy deserved it," I replied back, hearing someone clearing their throat and getting my attention. It was the new pilot, looking right at me with big eyes that were both memorizing and soulful, at least to me they were. I saw what he looked right finally instead of the back of his head: he had dark hair that was short but wavy, a youthful look on his face that was tan that made me think he was from another planet, and a crooked grin on his face. But the one thing that got me good and almost had me falter, were his eyes: wide and bright brown with a soothin sensation behind them.

"That was a bit fancy what you did there," He commented to me, his voice was once again soothing but charming at the same time.

"You tend to pick up a few tricks being a pilot from around here," I replied, seeing the grin widen slightly, "And thank you, by the way, for defending me against that guy."

"I was taught to be respectful to anyone and everyone, no matter who they are," he explained, holding out his hand for me to shake. I took it without thinking twice, "The name's Poe Dameron. Pleasure to meet you."

"Neyli Organa-Solo," I replied, seeing his eyes go a bit wide from hearing my last name. I knew that was coming, but then again I didn't expect him to seem so casual about it too like it was nothing.

"Well, a pleasure to meet you, Poe," I said to him since we had a moment or two of drinking in the fact that we just met each other. He smiled widely at me.

"Same to you, Neyli."

* * *

 **Present Day**

"How are his vitals?" I stood there with General Organa while we were watching outside one of the observation windows as Poe Dameron, recently rescued and brought back to us, was being analyzed on a medical table. I could only watch and hold my tongue, not being able to go in there and check him myself as another instinct of mine was coming over me. There was blood on his head, exhaustion all over his face as he was still trying to breathe. The medical robot was there doing his numbers, C3PO was right next to my mother.

"He's stable, he need plenty of rest at this point since his vitals are a bit lower than we expected. From what we are reading, pilot Dameron as been through some kind of mental trauma," All of our heads snapped over to the medical robot as the head medic in the hanger look at him in question.

"What kind of trauma?" The medic asked the robot.

"His brain waves are reacting in a harsh manner, as if he went through a traumatic and stressful event that spiked the waves," The robot explained to him as I saw my mother shake a bit, having me a bit worried. I touched her shoulder, knowing it was just the both of us now in the room.

"Mom?" I asked her, seeing her take one more breath before she looked over at me and I saw the look of horror on her face then, no matter how subtle she was trying to be.

"The only thing that I know that can really trigger something in someone's head…is the use of The Force," She said to me in a low tone as I cringed a bit. The Force was the one natural flowing energy in the galaxy that is all around us, according to both my mother and my uncle. It can be used for good, or for the Dark Side. The Dark Side of The Force can kill a man, change him completely and bring nothing but pain and chaos into the galaxy. If what I remembered from my Uncle and his teachings onto me, The Dark Side is just as powerful as the light, but more damaging to try and harness and also endure.

"Who would do that to him?" I asked her now in a hushed whisper, wanting to know more of the truth that could be unfolded in front of us, but my mother didn't say a word. She moved away before I could ask her again, having me think that she knew something that she was not going to tell me.

"Mom?" I asked her once more, but she already left the room and left me more out to dry than ever. What did she know? What was she hiding?

"Don't worry Master Neyli, I'm sure he'll be alright," C3PO said to me as I looked back at an unconscious Poe there, resting again on the table and I sighed from hearing the robot talk to me.

"You know how I hate it when you call me that, 3PO," I reminded him.

"Oh I know, but it's proper protocol," He replied to me in his chipper manner, having me softly smile at him and then look back at the room again. The medic and the robot were gone, the door to the side opening to have me see the both of them walking in and the medic looking right at me.

"How is he?" I asked the medic.

"He'll be fine, Captain. I don't advise him for flying for a few days just to get his own bearings together. He needs rests, but other than that, we can expect a recovery within days," He explained to me now and I nodded my head to show that I understood. He then moved away, the medical robot behind him following and I was left in the room with C3PO again.

"Shall I go report to your mother?" He asked in a wondering tone, having me still watch Poe, seeing him slowly wake up and looking up at the ceiling. I wanted to go in there and check on him, having me then look back at C3PO.

"Yes, go tell her what the medic told me," I ordered as I was moving out of the room.

"Of course, Master Neyli," He replied after me as I opened the door to into the room where Poe was in. Poe was breathing in and out slowly, almost blinking slowly as well to see where he was. I was just relieved that he was alright, thinking that worst when I got the call that he was brought into the hanger from one of our rescue X-Wings.

"Poe?" I asked, almost softly now so that I didn't scare him. He breathed in sharply now, hearing my voice and it made me walk over to him slowly, seeing him look around to find me since I could tell he heard my voice.

"Neyil?" He asked out loud in the room, his hand leaving the table right he was trying to reach out to me. I grasped it within seconds, not losing it within my own grasp there and he finally found my eyes. They looked scared, beyond scared, which was not typical Poe at all. I felt how cold and concerned his hold was on my hand, something really shook him. Maybe it was how he was captured, and whoever had him did nasty things to him. I could see it, and feel it, and it made me scared too.

"You're safe Poe," I reassured him, seeing him look right at me like he was making sure I was real in front of him, "You're back at the base and you're safe here."

"That stormtrooper….Finn. He saved me," Poe said, having me wonder what he was saying until he said something else, "Where's….where's BB-8?" He asked me in his soft tone, almost sounding like he was in pain from mentioning his beloved droid.

"He wasn't with you, Poe." I reminded him, seeing him then suddenly sit up and I placed my hands on his arms to get him to lay back down, "Poe, you need to rest right now."

"He's on Jakku," Poe said in a rushed manner, looking at me with pleaded eyes, "I left him on the planet when I was captured by The First Order when they attacked the village. He has what we need to find Skywalker, BB-8 has it! We need to find him!"

"Poe, I already have pilots looking for him though his transmitter, we will find him and bring him back to you here, okay?" I didn't want him to have a panic attack on me now since he still needed to heal, but I knew where he was coming from. BB-8 was his closest friend of a droid whom was loyal to him and would follow him wherever he went.

"There's something else," Poe said once again to me, the only two in the room and he made it sound so urgent in his soft whisper of a voice. It was then that he clutched our hands tighter, having m worry about what he was about to say to me, "The man who capture me from The First Order…Neyli….he's a Jedi."

"How is that possible?" I asked in a shocked tone, knowing that what I heard in the past meant that the Jedis no longer existed. They were gone, wiped out from the galaxy after the disappearance of my Uncle. To find one would be rare, rare and extraordinary.

"He had a saber, a red one, and he used The Force against me," He said it all so quickly like it was suffocating him from keeping it inside, "He got into my head, Neyli." It made me more scared for him, never being able to see him this undone before by anything or anyone. It shook him to the core, what happened to him and how it happened to him. Now I knew why: a Jedi, from The Dark Side, got into his head.

"He interrogated me to get to BB-8, he knows where BB-8 is and he'll find the data to get to Luke Skywalker," Poe said to me in such a bold statement, "I tried to not tell him….he just…got into my head and never stopped." I could tell he was about to crumble again now as I stroked his hands with my own, feeling how cold his hand got and how this was really working him up from the inside out.

"Poe, it's not your fault. For one who's not Force-sensitive to survive a practice like what happened to you is very rare, but possible." I reminded him, remembering my own teachings from Uncle Luke and what he told me about those who are Force-sensitive and those who are not. Those who are are more prone to survive the practice on them, and those who are not could not handle it.

"He saw you," He finally said to me in a broken manner, having me freeze there as he said it like a bullet to the chest, "The Jedi saw you in my head, he mentioned you. I didn't want him to see you, I tried to keep you away from him….. couldn't take it…I couldn't."

"Shh.." I had to stop him from suffering now, it was not going to help him out in the future as he kept going on like this. He broke because of what he allowed this Jedi to do to me, to see me within his own head. He was trying to punish himself for such a failed mission and I was not going to let that happen to him. I slowly leaned my head against his own, in hopes that he would calm down from what was weighing him down.

"Poe, we will find BB-8 and we will find my Uncle. I promise," I reassured him calmly now as I felt him slowly reach up to touch my cheek and jawline with his fingers, having me lean back and keep my stare on him as he did this, watching where his fingers were going and I could feel his fingers against my skin, leaving a trail of goosebumps and reassurance there, along with affection.

"I just have to make sure I'm not dreaming, that you're here." he said in a raspy tone, having me smile at him and take both of his hands to place them on my cheeks there, to feel his calloused palms and fingers there and seeing our eyes pouring into each other like pools of memories and kindness that we've placed on each other for years and years of friendship.

"Nothing is taking me away from you, Poe. I promise," I knew The Force was an evil thing to trick the mind when it was used in the wrong hands, and whoever did this to Poe was using it the way that would kill a man. This Jedi wanted me, and it broke Poe almost into a thousand pieces, not mention the loss of his droid on a remote planet that also had the piece that we needed to find my Uncle.

Whoever this Jedi was, I felt like he was not going away anytime soon.


	4. Chapter 4

**Planet Mindor**

 **1 year ago**

"Hang right! Another wave of them is coming this way! We must defend the city from the TIE fighters!" I swooped down low in my X-Wing, Q2 chirping away behind me as I got into a new formation with some of the others that were flying with me. Once again, I was leading the way with Poe on my right, a handful from the Resistance when we heard a distress call from the planet Mindor, a planet on the side of the Alliance. They were being attacked by The First Order, and Poe and I were the first to answer the call.

"I know, I see them too Q2. Keep an eye out for me." I said to my droid I was weaving through the harsh judge and close mountains, "Poe, what's your twenty?"

"I got three on my tail, trying to fend them off. How many do you have?" He asked on my intercom.

"I have five, cutting in tight, I'm trying to get them off of me near the mountains to the south," I replied, seeing the five behind me in my own view mirror. It was a tough spot for me to be in, but it was nothing that I knew I could not handle at all. This was typical, very typical, and I knew how to handle it without breaking a sweat. To anyone else this would be almost suicidal. But to me, this was another day at work.

"Let me get these guys off my tail and I'll come over there and help," Poe explained in my intercom, having me grin at his comment as I shifted over to the side within second, hearing one of the TIE fighters crash and burn into the mountain from not getting out of the way in time.

"No need to be my knight and shining armor, Dameron. Don't think I can handle it myself?" I asked him as I did another maneuver, ducking down low and hitting the brakes to have the TIE fighter fly over me and overtook, in return having me shoot and see it fall to the floor before I pulled up into the air again for more room.

"A little help from a friend is all a person needs, Captain." Poe countered back, but I could hear the cheekiness there in his tone, hearing shooting on his end and he cheered. It made em roll my eyes.

"Don't rush over here or anything," I muttered back to him, but I knew it was light when I felt one of the missiles hit the side of my fighter. Q2 bleep too loud for my liking.

"Don't tell me to pay attention, Q2. I can handle this, you just do your thing!" I reminded my droid, switching over the regular intercom to talk to the other pilots.

"Listen up! We have about 11 more of these guys to take care of and get out of the way before more damage will ensure. I'll double back and take ground to make sure none of the citizens are harmed," I said to the others.

"You got it, Captain!"

"Yes, ma'am!"

"We're with you, Captain!"

I was glad to have a group of pilots right behind me and fending them off for me. This was where I belonged, not in the war room around a large table and plans in front of me. My mother wanted me there by her side, though she wouldn't say it, it was true. Very true. But not me, I was a pilot through and through. Like, my father.

"I've got two targeting the city along the lake, get there before those missiles hit the ground!" I ordered the others, finding my way over to the main line of fire. The city was almost in blazes then, the TIE fighters were trying to light up most of the city there when I got there in time. Poe's X-Wing came in too, along with two more as we were trying to shoot down a couple of the fighters that were still left there in the open.

"Light them up!" I heard Poe say on the intercom.

"We can take them!" Jancon said in agreement. I took out one more fighter when my X-Wing took another hit, having me almost falter a bit now as I looked over to see that my engine was blown out. great.

"I'm hit, I'm taking her down and landing in the courtyard," I said in my intercom, then hearing Q2 whiz a bit at me now in annoyance.

"We'll be fine down there," I reassured Q2 as I started to lower my X-Wing down on the ground safely.

"Neyli, you're gonna need backup if you're going to get out of your fighter," Poe wanted me as I touched the ground, seeing some Stormtroopers already there and getting ready to fire at me. I took two shots from my X-Wing, leveling a couple of them out of the way before my opened the window.

"I don't need it!" Of course, I would be stubborn for something like this to happen, having em plasma gun I had for something like this. As soon as the top was open to my X-Wing, I popped up and over to shoot at a few of the Stormtroopers, some of them were trying to shoot at me but I hopped out and rolled onto the surface on the ground.

"Q2, stay there and don't move!" I commanded my droid as another Stormtrooper was coming my way. I took the shot, more of my comrades were helping me in the aid as TIE fighters were falling out of the sky and into the lake.

"Watch your back, Captain!" Janco warned me as I whirled around and shot at two more who were coming my way. Finally, I got my helmet off and threw it at one of the Stormtroopers that were going to shoot at me. It almost knocked him off when I got him again with the gun. Someone snuck up behind me and shot at me, skinning the top of my hand and having me gasp out, dropping my gun in my hand and almost fall to the floor. An X-Wing shot at the Stormtrooper, having me look up and over to see who it was.

Poe.

"Cocky," I said under my breath as I got up, the burning still there within my hand and the it was making me squinted it out in pain as I got the gun within my hand again. I shot a few more of the men there and I could see that we were clearly done with the mission. I sighed in relief, the last TIE fighter going into the lake. It was almost a sound of relief for me to hear. It was all over then, having me look around to see someone running up to me, one of the citizens of the town.

"Thank you for helping us," She said to me, an older being who had some people behind me. The X-Wings were landing along the shore of the lake. I only clutched my damaged hand, just nodding along with what she was saying.

"Anything we can do, why did they come here to your planet?" I asked her as I could hear footsteps behind me, having me keep my eyes on her and see the hesitance there on her face.

"The First Order was after something here," She explained to me, having me gaze at her in confusion and worry from what I was hearing, "They are under the belief that we have something valuable for them to use."

"What was it?" I asked, pressing on with what she needed to tell me, now seeing both Jancon and Poe in my line of vision.

"We don't know," She replied simply with a shrug of her shoulders, "We have nothing here on this planet that would put us and the Resistance in the hands of The First Order." It made no sense to me, having me feel more confused than ever. The being simply rubbed it off, smiling at us again and I could see the kindness there on her face, "But we are still so thankful for you all saving us. We are and still will forever be in the debt of the Resistance."

"You are still our ally, it's the best we can do," I reassured her, seeing her grin and walk away from us back to her people. I finally turned over to Poe and Jancon, along with the other pilots that were there that day. My head was turning from what she told me, something was valuable in the eyes of the First Order and they wanted it. Badly. My hand was burning and aching from the gunshot, and I was still trying to keep a stern and collective face of a Captain.

"Well done," I said to them, some of them including Jancon smirked from how I said it. It was Poe who was giving me a pilot kind of look, almost moving his look down to my hand every once in awhile, having me wonder what was going on in his head.

"We'll head back to base at D'Qar and debrief from there, letting General Organa know the report," I explained to them, seeing them nod their heads and move back over to their X-Wings, but not Poe. He stayed there as the rest of them left and got ready to head back, Poe walking over to me and I was about to ask him what was wrong, but he went for my injured hand, cradling it in-between both of his hands to examine it. I stayed still, grunting a bit from the burning pain to see how to looked: a thin long line on the top of my hand.

"Poe," I started with him, seeing him bring it closer to his face to see it better. It was close, dangerously close to his mouth then and I almost lost the ability to breathe.

"How bad is it?" He asked in concern as I finally moved my hand away from him.

"It's not bad at all, nothing a bit of cream and medicine can't fix," I reassured him, almost cradling the injured hand to my chest like I was protecting it. He then reached into his pocket and pulled out one of his bandanas, something I would do too when I would either have to clean my hands to use it on a job. I grabbed it, knowing better than to argue with him and wrapped my wound with it. It was a temporary fix, knowing that when I got back to base I would get it cleaned up for certain.

Poe kept his look on me for another moment or two before he then locked his eyes behind the both of us at my X-Wing. I did too, seeing the back smoke there and sighing in defeat.

"Q2 is going to take forever fixing that thing," I said in a mutter now as we both looked at each other again, a twinkle there in his eye.

"Well, if you want to leave Q2 here to fix it, I wanna show you something," He said to me carefully, almost like he was making sure he said the right thing about it. I rose an eyebrow to it, not thinking of what he would be saying to me.

"What do you mean?" I asked him, placing my hands in my hips.

"Look, I wanted to take you somewhere and show you something…somewhere…and since we don't have anything else going on…maybe we can go now?" He seemed nervous asking me that, and I still had no clue what was going on.

"What about the fact I still have to report to General Organa about this mission?" I countered, "And get my hand fixed up."

"You can send Jancon to do it, and we can get some medicine where we are going. Come on, Captain, live a little on this one with me." He urged me then, having me roll my eyes then. If there was ever a time I was going to say no to Poe Dameron, it was not going to be that day.

Damn him.

* * *

 **Planet Yavin**

 **Moon Yavin-4**

"You lived here?" I asked Poe in a gasp as I was looking at his childhood home on his home planet: Yavin 4. It was a beautiful place, a moon colony that was mostl inhabited. The home was nestled in the forest and everything else around it was green and flourishing in nature. It was a jungle moon, having me breathe it in and feel more at peace about the place since Poe flew the both of us out there. Bright and dark greens, deep blues of the rivers and small riverbeds, the pop of pinks and reds from the flowers interweaving there alomst the trees and bushes. It was a literal paradiese when we landed and I looked around. I could hear some of the animals within the nature, maybe the birds and other wildlife. It was almost more fitting for Poe to grow up here, amongst the wild nature and the colorful plants. It seemed to suit him.

His home was small, enough to fit a small family, but it looked cozy enough. I could tell someone built it from the ground up, how it was more homey and less of a morden kind of home with the right amount of technology to get through daily life. I loved how it was also one with the forest and the trees around it, which gave it more of an soothin aurora. The one thing that struck me was how isolated it was. That, and it looked deserted.

"I grew up here," He explained as I walked along the grass there and felt the warmth of the sun there against my skin, looking back at Poe who was not following me, standing on the edge of the clearing, "I still own it, I can do whatever I want with it if I want to."

"You still own it? Even after your father died?" I asked him. thinking that this was not something I would picture Poe to have in his life in his back pocket. He just nodded his head and I pointed at the house, "Why didn't you tell me before?"

"I didn't want to bring it up and flaunt it a whole lot," He confessed, having me just grin as he walked over to stand next to me, pointing to a direction over to the left of the house on the backside, "I brought you here to actually show you something in the backyard."

"What is it?" I asked him, more intrigue from just seeing his house. He started walking in that direction and I had to follow since I didn't know where he was going to lead me. I just followed, almost like an obedient puppy of sorts. But the pep in his step, how he was walking and turned the corner before stopping and letting me see what he was seeing.

It was a tree. A beautiful Force-Sensitive Tree.

The roots were deep in the ground, the trunk large in mass and almost looking like plenty of other vines morphed into one, reaching up to the thick branches that expanded and reached in different directions. The leaves were a hauntingly beautiful goal tint and glowing around the edges of the leaves and the branches, almost like small orbs of balls of lights hovering near and around the trees in almost a way of stars in the sky.

It was breath taking.

"A Force-Sensitive tree." I said in a gasp as I walked over, little by little to the tree but stayed a good distance away. It was unbelievable, the kind of trees that you would see in dreams, or hear in tall tales.

"Have you ever seen one before?" Poe asked me from behind as I looked high above me at the tall tree, shaking my head.

"My Uncle Luke told me that there was one that grew in the courtyard of the Jedi Temple in Coruscant. It was supposed to be a legend, ancient and fuel by The Force. With the rise of the Empire, it was destroyed for good," I explained to him as the leaves were hanging over me now from being so close to the tree. I could feel it, The Force, how it was soothing all over me and around me from being so close and almost touching the tree. I knew what The Force felt like, it's been years since I felt it this strongly, but I knew how it felt and what was happening within me. The feeling was soothing, almost like a wave washing over me and also prickling along the top of my skin.

"Apparently my folks, after they fought at the Battle of Endor, grabbed a fragment of the tree when it was destroyed," Poe explained as I reached up to touch one of the leaves. It felt lighter than air like I was touching a cloud and it made my smile even bigger. How I could see something like was too good to be true, and how was it so? I gave a look over to Poe again, still seeing him a bit away from the tree itself and I gave him a pondering look.

"Why did you want to show me this?" I asked him, really wondering what had him not only bring me to another planet after a mission but to his childhood home to see some kind of distant memory. He saw him shove his hands within his pockets, walking over to me slowly and keeping his hands in his pockets and that same twinkling look in his eyes.

"I thought you would like it," He admitted that to me, almost making me miss a beat within my own heartbeat as he was saying this like he was interested in me. He should be saying this to someone else, not me, "I mean, all of those stories you told me about training with your Uncle and learning The Force, it made me think that you would really like to see something like this."

"Well, you did the right thing," I confessed to him, looking back up at the tree again and seeing how small I looked compared to the mass size of the tree. It was the next line that I would hear from him that would almost make me want to faint.

"Plus I wanted to give you a piece of it," I said nothing, looking a bit in shock now as he walked over to stand next to me, his small makeshift dagger in his hand as he then leaned down to the green earth, touching the part of the root that was about the grass and took the dagger to it. Within seconds, he had a piece of the root within his hand, getting back up and then handing it to me. I didn't know what to say to him and how to say it, this seems like something a friend wouldn't give a friend. But there he was.

He was giving me the tree.

"I can't take this," I said to him in a soft manner, feeling the root on my skin and how light it was. But Poe was still staying that close to me.

"I want you to have this, Neyli," He said to me in reassurance, having me wrap my fingers around the root and look over at Poe, seeing how close he was to me and how I couldn't breath all the sudden. It didn't matter that I was a captain for a Resistance, all that did matter was the man who was standing so close to me and having me forget what was happening in my life, the man who was always so peaceful near me and was always loyal to me both as a pilot and as a friend.

"This is far too special for someone like me," I tried to reason with him, but he shook his head and took one of his hands to place on top of my own.

"Neyli, I loved playing under his tree when I was little, I would run around it for days and days on end. When I'm under this tree, I am beyond at peace and beyond happy, and I don't know if it's because of The Force or whatever, but I can't help but feel the same way when I'm around you. It's you that make me peaceful and happy, Neyli, and I want to give something that does bring me happiness, to someone that is far more important to me than anyone else that I know." It was too good to be true, having me think that this was a trick and a sick joke, almost a bad mind trick on me.

"I don't deserve something like this," I tried again to tell him, but he was now an inch closer to me, having me really see who beautiful his eyes were. Even after years of friendship, flying together and plenty of talks in the hanger, no matter how many times I convince myself that he would only see me as a friend, it was not enough.

Up until he kissed me under the Force-Sensitive Tree.

I thought the feeling of The Force was good enough for me, a pure feeling of energy and peace. But this, kissing Poe under a tree that as giving us a tinted glow. This was a brand new kind of energy that I was feeling all over me, sparks like fireworks and electricity all over my skin and behind my eyelids. This was beyond unexpected, and I felt like I was not the one while he should be kissing. Hell, I was more ordinary than anything.

He finally pulled away, but still staying so close to me and having my lips feeling the tingles there from our lips pressing together.

"Why did you do that?" I asked him in a whisper now, seeing him move his eyes from my own eyes to my lips, licking his own lips while he did this.

"I've kind of been wanting to do that for awhile now, actually," He replied to me in a smaller tone, my hand that was clutching the root was now holding it in a death grip. I gave him a nervous smile from what he said, the glow around him because of the tree almost made him more of a dream than any time before.

"Really?" I asked in a small shocked manner, seeing his grin get a bit bigger then and he nodded his head. Our hands were holding onto each other between us there, making me slowly want to realize all of the thoughts and the disbelief of myself and Poe. I kept saying that I was not good enough for him, not pretty enough, not daring enough, that I was far too ordinary. But how could I say that about myself when I have someone like Poe there, whom was beyond a dear friend to me and I knew would fight with me to the ends of the galaxy. I had to stop, I had to stop being the victim of my own thoughts and battered hopes. If Poe could see something in me, then I can show him what I see him in him in return.

I kissed him right back, holding it there and slowly feeling him kiss me back there. It was hitting all over my body, my mind was going back to the pleasant memories that I had with him since we met. The missions we had, the talks over meals or between training hours, and even just being near him. It was all coming back to me as we kissed under The Force-Sensitive Tree. He had an arm wrapped around me, his other hand was resting near my neck as I had both of my hands on his jacket holding on for dear life. With the root of the tree in my pocket and my heart bursting into pure joy, I was happier than I have ever been in my whole life.

* * *

 **Planet D'Qar**

 **Present Day**

I was sitting within my own Captain's quarters, looking at the smaller tree that was growing within its own pot on my desk, the small trunk there sprouting a few branches and a single golden leaf on the top branch. It was another sleepless night for me, another dream of my past childhood, with my brother. Why was I getting this more frequently these days than before? It didn't make sense. And after what happened to Poe, rescuing him from Jakku and finding out that a Jedi not only was still existing but was trying to get into Poe's head. He must have been far too powerful, one of the last ones to be left in the galaxy, and he was also trying to find my Uncle.

I thought my Uncle again, where he would be at this time. All of those times that I was training under him and hearing his lessons, using a training lightsaber and having him right next to me to show me the way of The Force. It made me miss him even more, I missed him dearly at this point.

" _You must clear your mind, let The Force show you," I was young again, Uncle Luke next to me as I was in front of a pyramid pile of stones on the grassy floor. I was maybe 7 or 8 years old, a year into my training along with my brother Ben. He was watching from next to me as I was concentrating on the pile of rocks there, needing to move them into a circle on the ground._

" _The Force must be flowing through you, let it surround you within its light and you can move those rocks," Uncle Luke instructed me from behind, having me close my eyes and picture the small amount of light, how it was moving and trying to stay still within me. It was hard to concentrate, my hand out in front of me to reach the rocks that were a good thirty feet away from me and I breathed out slowly._

 _Once I opened my eyes, my rocks were no longer in a pyramid, but in a perfect circle on the ground._

 _"Well done, Neyli." Uncle Luke said to me._

His voice.

I wasn't thinking about it, nor was I paying attention, but once I came back to reality from the memory of my Uncle, the small Force-Sensitive Tree on my desk moved from my desk to be hovering a good foot or two in the air, right in front of my face. I kept it hovering, remembering to keep my concentration on the tree and seeing it so stable there in the air, floating and sitting there right in front of my eyes. This was the first time I used The Force like this in a long time, there was never any real need to use it since I was piloting more, and my parents wouldn't allow it. They wanted me to restrict my use of it, not wanting to overdue it. I didn't know why, but I never wanted to question it.

I lowered the tree back onto the desk again, seeing the small glow it was harboring as I thought once again of the Jedi who captured and tortured Poe. Who was he? What did he want with Luke personally?

Most of all, why did he want to know me?


	5. Chapter 5

"Captain! We have a message from the Planet Takodana from a droid named GA-97!" I was looking over another map from another spec of the galaxy when I heard a call from C3PO. Poe was right next to me, still trying to find BB-8 and I knew it was killing him from the inside out not knowing where his droid was. I handed to find BB-8 as well, he was a good droid and he was valuable to finding my Uncle Luke.

"Bring it up to the screen," I said to him, seeing the voice message system on the screen in front of us, having me touch the play button and hear the message coming through.

"Alert the Resistance: they're missing driod is here."

"They found BB-8!" Poe said in a hopeful manner now as I looked over at him with a smile on my face. This meant that we were one step closer to getting to my Uncle Luke, getting more information that we can use in our favor against the First Order. All that we knew at this point was that there were two humans who were with BB-8 from the information that we picked up. Things were looking up in our favor then.

"Get the pilots ready, we'll send out the coordinates," I ordered Poe, seeing him nod in agreement as he moved away and was about to go out of the room when he stopped, along with the others because of who was coming through the door. My mother.

General Organa.

"What was the message?" She asked me as I played back the message for her one more time. I could tell something shifted within her as she heard the news, it made me excited then as I moved over to her side now, seeing her think to herself.

"We can get flyers out there to retrieve BB-8 and come back before they know it," I explained to her now as she thought about it some more, "This planet is one of our allies. Dad knows Maz Kanata as much as we do, she's no threat to us."

"We will only send a few X-Wings out there,e we can't be too careful," She instructed me, having me nod in agreement and start to move out as well before I felt her take me arm in hers, "Not you, though."

"What?" I asked her in disbelief as the rest of the people in the room, droids and pilots, were getting ready for what was to lie ahead. No one was paying attention to my mother and me, all except Poe. He was still at the doorway then, watching our small interaction and I really hoped that he was out of earshot.

"I need you next to me, as a Captain of the pilots to call out orders and keep an eye on the pilots," She reminded me, but I could see something else was there within her eyes, some other reason for not having me go out there.

"I can fly out there and be back before you know it, you really don't need me next to you to bark out orders," I tried to reason with her, but she was still holding her ground then.

"Neyli, they have plenty of pilots without you there. I want you next to me, end of the discussion," She repeated to me, still soft with a hint of sternness there in her voice. I knew there was not talking her out of that one and she was not going to let me out of her sight.

"At least, let me fly out in my own X-Wing right next to you in case they do need something," I asked her then, having her think about it for a moment or two. When it came to something with the First Order, she was always so hesitant to have me go out on a mission or any sort. It was like she was spooked with me being anywhere near a member of The First Order like she knew someone on that side that might kill me. It aggravated, only because I wanted to do my duty as a pilot but she wasn't letting me.

"You stay near my vessel and you do not leave my sight, under any circumstances unless I tell you. Understand me, Captain?" She asked me finally, having me sigh in relief since this was the only small amount of freedom that she was going to give me.

"Yes, General," I replied, feeling her let me go now and then walk away from me. I was still confused about my circumstance there, how once again she was keeping me on a tight leash and not letting me know why. She moved out of the room, leaving me there with Poe who was there the whole time. He finally moved over to me and was standing close enough to me for the both of us to talk in hushed tones.

"She's gonna let you fly with us, right?" he asked in a hopeful manner.

"She wants me to be next to her, not with you and the rest of the pilots," I replied, seeing him look a bit confused by it.

"Why not?" He asked, shifting a bit then.

"I don't know, but I'll be close by in my own X-Wing in case things do get hairy," I said to him in a hopeful manner, having me watching him think to himself for a moment or two about it. I grasped his arm then to get his attention once more, "Poe, we found BB-8. We're gonna get your droid back!" I wanted to steer the conversation away from me and my safety that was apparently needed with my mother to the real purpose for this mission: BB-8. That droid was far too important for us to miss and not receive. Poe grinned when I mentioned his droid, knowing that it was going to make him happy again. I knew he missed him, almost like a part of him was missing since we've never been apart from the moment BB-8 was assigned to him.

"I knew he was a tough little droid," He said in a lighter manner now, having me grin at him and place a hand on his back to get him to look back over at me. I hugged him close then, no one else in the room to see and to question what we were doing. Poe hugged me back, having me feel the hug through under my skin and making me want to keep it there to awhile. It was a sad thing since we've been together we've been needing to keep out relationship more of a secret than anything. I didn't know whether or not my mother knew about us, Jancon had a hint of it but decided not to say anything, and the rest had no clue. Poe and I knew we had to be more secretive, for both of our sakes.

"Let's go get him, okay?" I asked him while he was pulling away, Poe leaning over to give me a quick kiss on the lips before answering me.

"Come on," He replied to me, the both of us moving to go out of the war room again and having me breathe out a sigh of relief and adrenaline. Who knew what was going to be out there, and I only hoped that things were going to be looking up from here.

* * *

 **Planet Takodana**

"Give them everything you got!" I was flying next to the carrier that the officers and my mother were in, watching from afar and fulfilling my end of the deal: staying away from the battle that was happening. Once we were in space and close to the planet, we got word that the capital of the New Republic, Hosnian Prime, and four others within the same solar system were destroyed by a superweapon. It was the First Order, using their main weapon from their StarKiller that they created against us and they finally used it on one of our allied planets as a test.

We knew we were in for a major battle on our hands.

Poe was leading the charge in the area, where the Temple of Maz where locals were and were being hunted down and shot to bits by The First Order. They got there before us, somehow hearing about BB-8 and the two humans with him and they wanted to get their hands on the droid. I wanted to go and fight, but once again I was told to stay near my mother and not leave her side just in case something were to happen.

"General Organa, I see no sign of the BB unit around the area," Jancon said in the intercom of my helmet.

"There's too many stormtroopers on the ground level!"

"I can take care of them, but we need to find BB-8," Poe said in the intercom. I felt useless there, sitting next to my mother because she had a funny feeling about me being near the First Order. What else was I going do? I had to think of something and think fast.

"I have no readings of the unit being in the Temple," Jancon said into the intercom, and that was when I had enough of this. I knew I had to listen to my general, my mother, but I knew BB-8 had to be found before he was going to be snagged by the First Order under our noses and within our gasps.

"General, I need to go get BB-8 before anything happens," I said into the intercom now from my spot in the cockpit.

"Captain, I want you to-" I knew my mother was about to tell me off once again before I turned on my thrusters and sped towards the planet, turning off my intercom with the General and only having it with the pilots there. I was going to be in more trouble than I bargained for. But BB-8 was the main priority, he was the one I needed to get, not the approval of my mother.

"I'm coming in to find BB-8, who has a reading on him?" I asked the pilots.

"My droid picked up a reading on him within the forest outside the Temple," Jancon replied to me.

"Neyli, what about the General?" Poe asked me in a grunt as I knew he was under heavy fire.

"Your droid is my top priority, not her need to protect me. I can handle my own, you handle the First Order and I'll get your droid." I explained as I got into the atmosphere and then soared over to the area where I knew the battle was raging on. It was a green planet, lakes and river here and there as I sped through the sky in hopes to find the area in time. I could see it now, the rising of smoke and more TIE fighters in the sky. I had to think, not wanting to draw attention to myself and get more fire on me, that would make my mother more angry with me. I decided to dive down to the east, a bit away from The Temple and over to the larger lake, seeing something tucked away along the shore as I landed. I didn't think it would be there, and I was shocked to even see it.

The Millennium Falcon.

"Dad?" I asked as I landed on the floor and opened the top, popping my head out and looking around for a sign of him. Why was he here? Did he know what was gong on? Should I find him?

"Neyli, where are you?" Poe asked me in the intercom of my helmet.

"I landed near the lake on the east side, about to head out and find BB-8," I explained, shrugging off my pilot gear and having my black flight pants, gray shirt, and my brother jacket underneath. My hair flowed out into the wind in a messy braid and I grabbed my rifle.

"Neyli, something big just landed, you need to get out of there. I know what that is—" I threw off the helmet before I could hear more Poe. I hopped down from the X-Wing, looking back at Q2 and hearing the droid buzz at me urgently.

"Where is BB-8, Q2?" I asked, seeing him move his head around a bit before beeping back at me. He was to the East, deep within the jungle and I grinned, running off in that direction. I could hear the battle in the distance, the guns going off and the fighters in the air flying around me head. But my head was within the nation to finding the droid, running faster and weaving through the jungle with ease.

I hit one area where something shifted within me, something moved that made me want to stop and look around to see if I knew what I was feeling. Someone close by, someone very close by, was Force-Sensitive. That or the were using The Force out in the open. I could tell it, something was shifting me to show that someone was close by that I should either go to or be mindful. I went with the first, not knowing what to expect and I knew it was to the left, deeper within the forest and I ran, the shift and feeling were getting more and more intense as I was getting closer and closer to whoever or whatever it was.

"The girl I've heard so much about." The was a dark voice, almost like it was mechanic but still human at the same time, it gave a child down my spine the moment I heard it. For some reason, that voice was familiar to me, too familiar. Why was it familiar? Why was I both afraid and drawn to it at the same time? I followed where the voice was coming from, the same area where The Force was pulling me and showing me. Something bigger was going on, I could feel it and sense it now as I turned the corner and looked behind some trees.

In a small clearing, deep within the forest, I saw two beings there, facing each other. One of them was a female, wearing clothes that a scavenger would wear on a desolated planet far away, and she looked terrified facing the other, who was dressed in black from head to foot and was wearing a mask, a full helmet covering his face. I was in shock from what I saw him his hand.

A red lightsaber. Poe was right, this was the Jedi.

"The droid," The man said aloud, moving around the girl to stand behind her and the saber was still out, having me then notice that the girl as frozen there, not able to move. The Force was being used on her, he was using it against her and keeping it still as he raised his saber to be near her neck, "Where is it?"

I was not meant to be caught up in this, but when he mentioned the droid, I would have to assume that he was meaning BB-8. So far, he didn't find our droid and that was a victory in my book then, but I then had to realize that I could not stay here for long. He might know I was there, and I slowly started to move back and out of the way and over to find BB-8 then. This was now where I was meant to be, I was mean to be somewhere else and away from the harm. But once again, I felt a strange pull to the masked man, almost like I knew him but I didn't. It didn't make sense at all to me.

I had a mission to do.

I finally stopped in another part of the forest, having to close my eyes and finally use The Force to find the droid. He must be hiding, away from the others if he knew that he was important and not meant to be captured. I tried to think of the small droid, picturing him in my head and finding him wherever he was. It was hard at first since I haven't used the Force like this since I was a little girl and it was almost a rusty trade for me to do.

 _Beep! Beep!_

I opened my eyes, right in front of me on the ground and looking up at me, was BB-8.

"BB-8! You're here!" I said in a gasp as I fell to my knees and he rolled over to me, having me hug him. I was relieved to find him here in the forest. He chirped against me as I felt him snuggle into me more.

"He's looking for you too, he misses his friend. Come on, we can get back to him!" I said to him as I got up and I started to run back over to the main area of the Temple. BB-8 rolling right behind me. We were running fast at that point then, not slowing down one bit as I could hear more and more blasts coming from the area where we were going.

"Stay with me, don't lose me!" I said to BB-8 as we were making it to the clearing again and I saw more of the action still happening. But it was in our favor, TIE fighters were backing off and our X-Wings were circling around to keep the place at bay. That meant my mother was going to be coming soon, and I ran with BB-8 over to the heart of the rubble and battle. There were still a couple of more Stormtroopers out and about now as I got there, BB-8 right on my tail and not losing my sight as I shot at some of the Stormtroopers that were there.

"Neyli!" I whirled around, hearing my voice and knowing whom that belonged. I saw him, a man whom I didn't think I would see in years. My father.

"Dad!" I said in a panic, a stormtrooper was about to shoot him from behind and I got to him first, Chewbacca was right behind him and they both looked in surprise now as I jogged over to them now. He looked older beyond his years, almost seasoned really and worn out as I approached him, rifle still in my hand and looking a bit out of it myself.

"You look good," I commented to him, BB-8 chirping behind me and I looked down at him.

"We'll get you to Poe, I promise," I reassured him as I heard Chewbacca grumble at me now with a warmth there. I had to smile at the old friend there, a member or our family whether I knew it or not.

"Good to see you too, Chewbacca," I said to him, seeing him grin and nod his head. I felt then it again, the shift within my chest and it made me stumble a bit now as I felt it like a thirst against my heart, making me look over my shoulder now and see the black masked man, carrying the girl who was now unconscious, into his main TIE fighter. I moved away from my father and Chewbacca, BB-8 staying with him and hiding a bit now as I watched, the man in black stopping his walk and handing the unconscious girl to another stormtrooper now as he turned. He looked right at me.

He saw me.

He threw up his hand, the Force grabbing me like a death grip and I was being pulled over to him, my rifle dropping in the process. I grunted and was trying to move out of it and I tried to remember my training again, thinking that I had to find my way out of it as I was getting closer and closer to him, not wanting to have it be my death. Not yet. I remembered, not to get out of it, throwing it back at him. I concentrated, glaring at the man and shooting my own hand out at him to throw out my own usage.

It worked.

I fell to the floor in a stop and he stumbled a bit, losing his grip on me now as I stood up again with no weapon and was trying to hold my ground. I was about to run away, but he then said something else that gave me a chill and almost made me panic.

"The pilot I've captured," He said in his menacing tone, having me freeze to think that he was talking about Poe, "You're the girl I saw in his head."

"REY! NO! REY!" Someone was running our way now, another human who was bolting over to the TIE fighter the masked man was in. We both looked to see him running for dear life, but when I looked back, the door the up and the TIE fighter was already in the air. The man who was running, he stopped next to me as we watched the TIE fighter fly off with the others from the First Order.

He was gone.


	6. Chapter 6

"They took her! Did you see that?! They took her!" I was still looking up in the sky when the human stranger said that to my father, having me look over at my dad and Chewbacca who were watching the sky as well, my dad looked more remorse about it than anything. It made me look back at the sky once again, nothing else was there to be seen. It made me shiver there, not being able to move from what just happened to me.

The Jedi, the use of The Force, and how I fought him off.

It shook me to the core, the very Jedi that had Poe under his torture, the one Jedi who was after the plans for BB-8 and for Uncle Luke, I saw him face to face and I heard him. He knew me, he knew who I was because of his torturing on Poe. But it felt like there was something more to him, something that I knew all along, Why did it feel like he was familiar to me? The Force, as tacky as this was going to sound in my head, was very strong there within him when we locked eyes.

"Neyli," I heard behind me, having me finally look over to see my dad here. Han Solo, the infamous war hero and rebel from the past who was more of a scoundrel than anything, was right there in front of me. He was cocky, thrilling, compassionate, and rough around the edges. But most of all, and first of all in my life, he was my father.

"Hello dad," I said to him, a smile was there on my lips. He finally walked over to me, Chewbacca right behind him and I found myself in the arms of my father. He was never one to really flaunt this kind of stuff to anyone else other than his family, and I've missed his hugs there and how he would hold me close.

"If I remember correctly, your mother doesn't really like you being in the eye of the storm of battle," he reminded me, having me grin against his jacket now as I pulled away from him and looked up at him.

"Well, if I do remember correctly, it was my own father that taught me to fly out of the seat of my pants," I countered back at him in a grin, seeing him stare at me at first with a confused look, but then he grinned at me from what I told him. He then reached down a bit since he had a small amount of height on me, moving a strand of hair from my eyes like he used to do when I was a child.

"Good to see you, Neyli," He said in a heartfelt manner now. I grinned at him widely now, feeling a bit better to have this kind of reunion with my father, even after a battle of the sort.

"I've missed you, dad," I admitted to him, almost having me see a look of actual feelings there on his face. I didn't know if I hit a nerve with him or not, but it almost looked like it to me. Chewbacca mumbled at me then, having me look over at him now and shrug my shoulders.

"I know, I did learn from the best, didn't I?" I asked him then, seeing Chewbacca nod at me in agreement. My dad then glared at his friend.

"Don't agree with her!" He argued, having me then feel a tap against my leg. Looking down, I saw BB-8 there and he was almost rubbing up against my leg now and he wheezed at me in unrest. I grinned, kneeling down to be at eye-level with the droid while my father and Chewbacca moved away now. My mother's vessel was coming into the atmosphere and was landing nearby, I could hear the engine and the power behind it.

"I'll get you to Poe, don't worry," I reassured BB-8 now as I heard him chirp a bit more at me now, having me look that the droid in confusion as he kept going with his conversation.

"Finn? He's part of the Resistance too?" I asked him, seeing him then motion with his head over in the direction of the stranger who was next to me sometime before. I looked too, the young man there still looking distressed from seeing the woman from the forest, a friend of his parentally, being taken to the sky. BB-8 wheezed some more, getting my attention to him again.

"The girl's name was Rey?" I asked, BB-8 chirping some more, "She found you on Jakku? You care about her, don't you?" BB-8 looked sad then, having me feel him snuggle into me a bit more before I looked back at the stranger, Finn, and he was looking more lost than ever. I got up from my kneeling position with BB-8, walking over to him now and BB-8 right on my tail. Finn looked over at me, the lost was still there in his eyes as he find my own. He was young, maybe around my age if not younger than me, wearing a jacket that was familiar to me. I was a bit shocked from seeing it.

Poe's pilot jacket.

"Are you Finn?" I asked him, BB-8 chirping behind me and having me look down at him in a stern look, "Shh, I'm just asking!"

"I am," I looked back at Finn, seeing him look at me directly in the eyes, having me realize he's been through plenty as of late. I smiled at him, seeing Finn point at BB-8, "You can understand him?"

"I can, I'm good friends with his master, Poe Dameron." I explained to him, seeing him light a bit in his eyes and on his face," BB-8 told me that you know him?"

"I saved him, from the First Order," He replied, having me look in shock as to how he could do that. Was he there too? Was he also under torture and they wanted to get out together? I wanted to ask him, but nothing slipped out of me at all as he went on with his story, "He told me about BB-8 that was on Jakku and he needed to get him." I finally moved my feet to stand directly in front of him, seeing him look a bit take back from my action then and there.

"I should thank you then, for saving Poe's life when you could," I explained to him in a sincere tone, holding out my hand for him to shake. He reluctantly shook it then, feeling somehow both at bit out of place and at was at the same time shaking my hand, "You've done a great service for us in the Resistance."

"Anything I can do," he said to me, then looking up at the sky again before releasing my hand. It made me took too, thinking of that masked man and girl, Rey. Finn must have bene hurting for her, wanting to find her.

"We'll find her, Finn. Trust me," I reassured him, thinking that it was the best thing to tell him. Who knew what was going to happen to her next, or why she was taken in the first place. But it was short lived by the calling of my name, having me grimace a bit and turn back around again, seeing none other than my mother and father, the both of them looking right at me as if they were waiting for punish me. I sighed, BB-8 quivering a bit behind me with a few beeps going aloud.

"Don't be scared, you haven't dealt with them since birth," I reasoned with BB-8 now as we both headed over. I knew I was in trouble, and I knew it was going to be bad enough for me now as I walked over for my sentencing. They both were giving me looks, but it wasn't the look I was thinking I was going to to get. It wasn't sternness, nor was it anger or disappointment. it was something else, something that threw me off.

Fear.

"Neyli, you alright?" My mother asked me as if I was going on a mission and she was checking up on me. Wasn't she going to be punishing me? It made no sense to me now as I nodded my head slowly, waiting for the yelling to commence, But once again, nothing came. She looked at my father, who looked at her too and they both exchanged a look.

"Did I miss something? I thought you were going to punish me for going against your orders?" I asked her now, really wanting to know what as going on and if I really did miss something. She didn't say anything, though, looking more saddened about something.

"Neyli, you saw the masked man?" my father asked me, more curious than anything.

"I did, he took Rey into that TIE fighter and left the area…" I said to him now, trying to connect the dots but nothing was working.

"Did he say something to you?" He asked in a bit of urgency then.

"I don't know…what is going on with you two?" I asked them now no longer as a soldier but as their daughter. I have never seen this distraught over something and it had me in the middle of it. I saw my own mother keeping her ground there before taking in a deep breath and then looking right at me.

"Get to your vessel and get back to base, we'll debrief from there," She said to me.

"But—"

"Please don't argue with me on this one," She urged me, still keeping a soft tone but I knew if I asked one more time I would be in for a yelling spree. I sighed, finding no strength in me to argue with her since I've been through enough in one day as it was. I looked over to my father as my mother walked away from me now, seeing him give me a compassionate look.

"You know how your mother is. Just go with the flow of it," He replied to me, having me nod at him and agree it was not wise to yell at my mother about something that I was out of my control. He then looked down at BB-8 who was still hiding behind me, pointing to the droid.

"I'll take him to the base, along with Finn, okay?" He asked with BB-8 rolling over to his side and I nodded my head.

"Okay, see you back there," I replied to him, walking away from my father and over to the direction of my X-Wing. I was still filled with questioned there within my head: why were my parents scared? What were they hiding from me? Did they know about the masked man?

What in the hell was going on?

* * *

 **Planet D'Qar**

"Here you go, Q2," I said to me droid as the droid was plopped down back not he ground from the X-Wing, leaning down to check on him he beeped at me angrily, "I told you I was sorry for leaving you there. Don't act hurt about it, I knew you could take good care of yourself."

We were back at base, and after talking with my parents with the most awkward conversation we have ever had to date, I was still trying to piece everything together in my head then. I was just glad to be out of that planet and back where I knew the most, whom I knew the most.

"Yes, BB-8 is just fine if you have to know," I said to Q2 as he chirped at me, "He's talking to Poe right now, you can have your reunion with him soon enough." It made me look back at Poe and Finn, who were talking at the base, BB-8 next to them. Poe and Finn looked like they were having their own region there, smiling at each other like they've known each other for years and years on end. Poe must have meant plenty to Finn and vice versa, having me glad that Finn was the one who saved Poe and got him back to safety, back to me.

I the saw Poe and Finn walking over to the hanger, BB-8 with them and I saw Q2 go over to the droid and they were talking together now. I stayed still though I was not wanting to move as Poe caught my eye and he leaned over to Finn.

"I'll be right in there, BB-8 will show you to General Organa," Poe said to Finn, whom nodded his head and followed both BB-8 and Q2 as Poe was making a beeline over to me now. Within seconds he engulfed me in his arms, holding me close in a protective manner and almost sighing in relief as he hugged there in the open. For the first time, I didn't mind holding him out in the open and just breathing in him.

"I got scared, not knowing where you were," He confessed into my hair was he hugged, having me squeeze him back and pull away to see the fear in his eyes, "When you landed, I got worried that something happened to you."

"I'm okay, Poe." I reasoned, but he still looked panicked.

"It was the same Jedi, the one who tortured me. I thought…I thought he got to you," He said to me in worry now as I shook my head at him.

"He didn't get to me. He saw me..." Poe looked shocked when I said that but I went on to smooth it out, "But he didn't get me." I didn't want Poe to worry over me from a small interaction with a masked Jedi, we had other things to worry about to think about than me. Poe finally let the conversation go at that point.

"Look, let's just go into the war room and find out what BB-8 does have, okay?" I asked him, seeing him nod his head in agreement, the both of us walking together then and head over to get the rest of this mission over with and rolling. I wanted to focus on something else, at least in front of the others.

We had other things to worry about, not just my interaction with the Jedi.

* * *

I snapped awake from another dream, another crazy dream involving the Force and it gave me a chill there, I was once again waking up in a cold sweat and having those images stuck on my head. The Jedi pulling me towards him with The Force, how I broke away from him, and how he knew who I was.

It was so real.

I sat up slowly in my bed, blinking a few times and I rubbing my eyes to get whatever image in my head out of there. Finn explained to us what was going on when he talked to my mother and myself, how he really wanted to find his friend Rey and my mother was willing to help as long as he told us all he knew. He knew more than we thought, working for them at one time and we were already cooking up a plan to end it and find my Uncle Luke. For me, it seemed too good to be true.

It was now early in the morning, far too early for me to be awake then and I didn't really want to sit still anymore. For some reason, waking up and having my heart rate go up from that dream, I didn't want to sit still. I started to walk around my room, thinking of it over and over again on how I had that ability to break The Force from the Jedi. It didn't seem possible, not even closer with me since I haven't been trained in years.

"Neyli?" I looked over to my door that was leading out into the main hallway. I gaze over there, my arms crossed in front of me like I was in deep thought and I saw it was Poe, watching me with a nervous look on his face and in his eyes. He was wearing his pajamas, a loose t-shirt, and pajama pants. He was watching me in worry now as he was near the door and not coming inside yet. I must have looked like a nervous wreck in front of him, pacing back and forth there in my room in my own sleeping attire and messy hair.

"Can't sleep," I admitted, seeing him nod in agreement as he closed the door behind him.

"I can't either," he replied, then walking over to me and opening his arms up for me. He was silently telling me to come to his arms, to hold him close to come back to reality again, and I did just that. I rested my forehead against his shoulder, his arms around me like a protective shield and his cheek against my hair as we embraced in the middle of the room.

"What did you dream about?" He asked me softly, his voice filling the room without him trying. I traced his thin shirt a bit with my finger and his own fingers tapping against my skin in a steady rhythm.

"Today, with the Jedi," I said to him softly, almost breathing in the scent that was Poe that was both claiming and intoxicating, "I don't know, it felt like…it felt like I knew him."

"Knew him?" Poe asked, sounding a bit confused about it himself when I voiced what I was thinking.

"I don't know how else to explained it. But when I saw him, it felt like something big shifted," I tried to explain what I was feeling at the time, but it wasn't sounding right. I didn't know how else to explain it to Poe, of all people whom would listen to anything I told him. It was then that I gave up, thinking it was another time to talk about it and dwell on it to have my head feel heavier.

"Why are you awake? You never have nightmares from what I remember," I said to him now lightly, feeling him smile against my hair and I felt a bit better bringing the conversation away from me and over to him. He was quiet for a moment or two, still holding me there in the middle of the room as I wondered what was going on with him.

"It was me being tortured," he explained to me careful, almost sounding a bit out of it himself when he mentioned it,"Being back there, having him get in my head and see everything," He pulled away from me and I felt our hands joined together instead of being wrapped around each other.

"You're stronger than you give yourself credit for, Poe," I reminded him as we both walked over to my bed, sitting on the top and being wrapped up in each other's arms then, just talking about our own dreams. We both were leaning against the wall near the pillows, my head on his shoulder and our hands intertwined again with his other arm wrapped around me, "It's not easy going through what you did and coming out in one piece."

"How do you know?" He asked me, not in aggravation, but in curiosity.

"My Uncle Luke told me about it, it's hard to fight off someone getting into your head," I explained to him in a simple way. it was funny how some of the things Uncle Luke was telling me was coming back to me, wave after wave of memories and teachings he would give me. It was like a switch went off, a switch in my brain that was making me remember more and more of the times I was training with him and my brother.

"Still, it rocked me pretty good," Poe commented in a low manner, having em feel his thumb tracing a mark on the top of my skin on my hand, "Nothing has shaken me up this bad since my mom's death when I was little."

"But you made it through, give yourself that much," I urged him as he looked down at me and I up at him. I leaned up and kissed him, keeping it nice and sweet and he planted a smaller kiss against my lips. No matter how many times we shared a kiss, a holding of hands, or even a gaze from one to another, it never ceases to give me butterflies and goosebumps along my skin. But with this kiss, I was not wanting him to keep thinking back on the negative and more on the positive, "You're back here, safe and sound, and BB-8 is here too with you. So I don't have to hear your bellyaching about him anymore."

"Be nice, will ya?" He asked me in a joking manner, poking me in the side now as I giggled there within his arms, "Never cutting me slack, as always."

"You love it," I tried to have him admit there, the mood was back to normal between us now and I felt a peace again with Poe there. These moments with him were far more precious for me, not having to talk about the battles we were in, the First Order and what they were capable of doing, or anything else like it. We would just talk to each other about anything else that would be on our mind.

"Do you think it'll be over? This war with The First Order?" I asked him out of pure curiosity and wonder to it. For as long I could remember, we were already fighting the First Order, grabbing their information, using counter attacks against them, and trying to maintain the peace. All from the disappearance of my Uncle, that was when it started.

"I do," He replied to me without hesitation there, almost sounding sure of himself really, "I think it will be over."

"What are we gonna do after that?" I asked him another, realizing that all of our lives was consumed with being in the Resistance, and after that, what? What was I going to do? It never was really thought of before, not with me since I was always running off being a Captain and helping with the cause of the Resistance. Was there going to be something else for me?

"I know what we're going to do," Poe said to in me in a smile, having me grin too and wonder what he was thinking.

"And what's that?" I asked him, playing along with this game.

"We're going to go away from here, find our own planet to live on, and just be at peace for the rest of our lives," He was saying it like it was some kind of vow between us, a promise that we were going to uphold to one another and keep within us until we can fulfill it. He had such faith in us, faith and hope that we were going to have a future together, no matter where we were and what we were doing. I believed in it too, the end of the fighting, peace back in the galaxy.

And a future and life with Poe Dameron. I'll take that over anything.


	7. Chapter 7

**Jedi Temple**

 **15 years ago**

" _Neyli, Ben! Come, I have something for you!" Both my brother and I were running down the hall of the temple to get over to where our Uncle Luke was. He just came back from another mission that he went on, something that he was not going to tell us as a surprise. I didn't know why, it almost felt like a tease to me and my brother, both of us were wanting to expand with our training._

 _I could remember my brother, being more and brasher and impulsive when it came to his training when I was more thoughtful and reserved about it. We were slowly booming opposites with what we wanted to learn from Uncle Luke, both a good thing and a bad thing at the same time. My Uncle Luke could see it, and I could see it too._

 _It worried me._

" _What is it, master?" He asked him now in a rushed manner, the both of us stopping at the entrance of the training room, collecting ourselves now before entering the room with smooth walking and a collective peace amongst us. It was a rule, entering the room in a collective stature and ready to learn and practice with whatever Master Luke wanted to do with us. The room was a dome of a room, wide and open to our practices and our meditation. There was Master Luke, in his Jedi attire and a large table in the middle. There were objects there on the top of the table, small enough to fit my hand, and it made me more curious as he was watching the both of us staring at his table._

" _Did you have a good trip, Master?" I asked him politely as we stood in front of him with our hands behind our backs and ready for anything he could throw at us. He grinned, nodding at the both of us now with his hands folded in front of him._

" _I did, but I did miss my two most promising students," He said in a small smile on his lips. then walking around to being behind the table for us to see. I looked, Ben craning his head to see what it was: crystals._

" _I did not tell you where I was going and what I doing, because I wanted you to focus on your lessons while I was away and not worry about me," Master Luke was explaining to us now as he then pointed to the crystals, "I went to a distant planet that was still harboring the main component to a lightsaber and for a Jedi to use," He paused, as if he was waiting for one of us to speak and answer him. I looked over to Ben, seeing him smile widely from his spot._

" _Kyber crystals," He said in confidence._

" _Precisely, Ben. I know it is a right of passage for younglings to go and harvest their own Kyber crystal to build and create their own lightsaber, but given how dangerous it is for Jedi's to travel nowadays, especially younglings, I took the liberty of bringing back a few myself," I looked on the table again, seeing them all in a line and new feeling of hope and anticipation was there within my chest. This was the day we were choosing our crystals, we were going to make our sabers._

 _It was beginning officially._

" _I brought back enough for all of the younglings that I am teaching, but I am letting the both of you have the first choice since you are my top padawans," he explained, motioning to the table now with his hand and then keeping his eyes on the both of us, "When you chose your crystal, The Force will be used fully. You must let The Force guide you to your crystal, for you crystal will match you and you alone."_

 _I felt a bit nervous then, not knowing what to think and how to go through with this. It was a serious task for me, to find the right crystal for me and my training. I only wondered if I was going to make the wrong choice if I was going to make a mistake and it would blow up in my face later._

" _Neyli, I want you to choose first," Master Luke said to me, having me see Ben look over at me now with a bit of hurt in his eyes that he was not going to choose first. But when I looked back at Ben, he smiled and nodded at me, showing that he was right behind me as usual. I took a few steps towards the table now, seeing all of them lined up for me to choose one and I felt as though my breath was cut in my throat._

" _You're hesitant," Master Luke said to me in a calmer state, having me nod since I knew he was tapping into me to both calm me and read me._

" _I am, Master," I replied to him, "I don't want to make the wrong decision."_

" _If there's one good trait within you that will not be in vein, it is your instinct. You have a good heart and a good conscience about you, my Padawan. You will not make a mistake," He reassured me, having me take a deep breath and close my eyes, "Let The Force guide you. Remember your ability and your light within you."_

 _It was a calming wave over me again, The Force was once again coming within me and showing me a warmth of peace and a warmth of light. It was all that my Master told me it would be, a guiding way to see the galaxy, how things would grow and how it would make people make the choices that they would make._

 _Before I knew it, I already was holding one of the crystals within my hand, somehow being guided over by The Force and seeing the light behind my eyes and within my veins. It was a smaller crystal compared to the others, a bit more delicate and more beautiful to see, but it ended up in my hand. When I opened my eyes, I saw that I was still a good feet or so away from the table, which meant one thing._

 _The Kyber Crystal came to me._

" _It's chosen you, padawan." Master Luke explained to me now as I looked down at the crystal within my hand there, having me feel the waves of relief come over me, a pure kind of power. This was the new beginning for me, a beginning that I never knew I could be a part of._

* * *

 **Planet D'Qar**

 **Present Day**

It was another peaceful night there in the hanger, more preparations were being made to find out more about The First Order and what was going to happen next. We were all on edge, we were all wanting to have this finished once and for all. But it was taking another turn for the worst, a secret weapon called the Star Killer was created by The First Order to keep their power in the galaxy, a weapon so powerful and so large in scale that it would kill off any other planet that it chooses to.

Our plan was coming into effect, they were going to find a way to destroy the weapon and give us more of an advantage. But as I stood there, hearing the plan being unfolded by not only my mother but Finn since he knew of it more than anyone else there at the base, I was still going back to those memories that were haunting me. Vivid enough to keep me up at night and have me almost relive them all over again. It was like a wall was there to hide something from me, and it was now almost crumbling down little by little, piece by piece.

I found myself out in one of the hangers, most of the X-Wings were out in the open beyond the doors. It was quiet, a bit enough hanger for me to stand there and feel like an ant. It was another place for me to think, to think out all that was bottled and blocked in my head. The darkness consumed me then, having me see nothing but feel the metal against my fingers in my hand. This was a first for me in a long time, having me use this tool since my mother as afraid of me using this. Since my brother's death, it made me more scared for me to anywhere near it.

My saber.

I clicked, the hanger instantly glowing as the saber grew up on one end, having me see the tint of yellow come over the hanger within. My saber's color was yellow, a very rare color according to my Uncle Luke when it comes to the colors of saber for The Jedi. I knew of blue and green, blue meaning protection and green meaning peace. But Yellow? He even knew it was rare, but it was a constant current color that was showing an individuality of a Jedi. I should be proud and delicate with my Yellow saber, taking it seriously now as I was now going through the motions of my old training. Twirling the saber, hearing it hum against my palm as I moved through, in and out in the hanger. The yellow tint within that large room moved and shadowed with my movements now as I struck, dove, tucked, whirled.

I was training again.

It made me remember being a child, feeling The For move through me like blood in the veins, showing me were to strive next and how to move like a water in the river, like a star in the sky. It was making me feel complete again, a saber in hand and a head ready to move through the motions. But it also made me remember my master, Uncle Luke, and how he would correct me and praise me. It made me miss him and want to find him more and more.

But one again, my thoughts were back on the Jedi, the very same one whom I felt had a connection with me and I in him. It made me move harder, faster with my feet and my saber now as I wonder where he learned and how he learned to use The Force. But lastly, I thought of my brother then and how he was no longer here with me. I missed him, his voice to me when we would play or talk, his face and how he reminded me of home when we were training in the Temple.

I missed my brother.

I ended my session there in the middle of the hanger, my yellow saber thrust out in front of me like I was striking someone there. It made me remember the last memory I had with my brother, how he was throwing himself into the Dark Side, and how I was not able to bring him back. It burdened me, almost pained me from what I was able not to do. I couldn't save him, no matter how many ways I thought in my head on how I could have saved him. It was too late, and it made me want to cry.

I had one more thing to do: find my Uncle Luke.

* * *

"It's my saber," I explained to Poe, seeing him hold my saber there in the middle of my Captain's quarters, looking up at the yellow glow that was haunting the nearly dimmed room and he was standing so still. I was letting him see the saber for the first time, I've never shown it to him in either secrecy or in a hint of embarrassment. I never wanted to flaunt the fact that I was training as a Jedi, even in my talks with Poe, I never wanted to show it like a beam of light. But this, this was huge for me to show my own saber that I made as a padawan to Poe.

"Is it supposed to be this color?" He asked with such innocence there, having me grin and see how big his eyes were from looking at the saber in his hands, almost feeling the bit of power there. He seemed such like a child holding something magical for the first time, a hint of innocence there.

"The most common colors are blue and green, meaning protection and wisdom," I explained as he moved the saber slightly to hear the humming and almost avoid breaking the wall with the power of the saber, "Yellow is the less common, apparently it's the color of the Jedi guards from the Jedi Council. Even my Uncle Luke was surprised from the color." He moved it around a couple more times, a small smile was there on his face as I just stood there and watched. He looked the same way I did when I was younger, trying out my saber for the first time: amazement. I finally walked over to him, seeing him tear his eyes away from me now and give me his warmth of a smile as I pressed the button to bring the saber in again so he can just hold the handle.

"Why didn't you tell me about it before?" He asked me, not in angry or anything of the sort, but in his typical curiosity of a tone of voice. I took the saber hand from his hand and I shrugged my shoulders. placing it on the counter behind me.

"My mother didn't want me to use it at all, not after Ben died," I explained to him, "I don't know, I think it scared her for me to use it. I think it reminded her of him, that The Force turned him to The Dark Side," It was almost painful to just talk about it, rethinking all the times my mother saw fear when she saw my saber out there in the open. I looked back at my saber too, having those thoughts fill my head.

"Maybe she thought I was going to go dark too," I admitted to him, almost in a painful way then, "And I could still go to The Dark Side if I use it."

"That doesn't sound like you at all," Poe said in a careful way, trying to avoid me talking about The Dark Side and how I was able to have that happen to me, "You're not one to go to The Dark Side."

"My mother doesn't believe that," I countered back, but I felt Poe take both of my hands in his to get my attention again. He looked serious when we locked eyes, almost too serious for my liking.

"I know that," He reminded me, squeezing our hands together, "I know you far too well to know that there is not once ounce of The Dark Side in you."

"What if something does happen to me to bring it out of me?" I questioned mostly to myself but to him as well, making me more worried about it now. It was making me worry about what would happen to me if something like that happened if something snapped within me and make me go to The Dark Side. What would it be like? Falling in a black hole, never being able to find who I am again.

"Neyli…" Poe was trying to reach to me again, then framing my face within his hands now and having me hear his voice that was still soothing and urgent then to get me back from my mind, "Neyli…..look at me, okay?"

I finally looked over at him now, no longer thinking of The Dark Side. There he was the pilot who captured my heart and makes this life worth living. I felt his thumbs and fingers touching my skin like I was a fragile kind of specimen to him, afraid to put pressure there and break me into a thousand pieces.

"You know that I would never let that happen to you. Ever. You believe me?" He asked me, a stern tone there but love was found in his eyes. He was trying to reassure me that nothing like that would happen to me, that I would not feel the pull to the darkish and get swept away by it. I knew that it was dangerous for me to get too close to The Dark Side, and so did Poe. He was willing to help me steer away from that point.

"I do believe you," I replied back to him, seeing him smile at me then and it felt all was well there between the both of us. He smiled at me again, having me wrap my around him and feel him once again free his lips to my own to imprint them there, like a seal. I kissed him back, feeling one of his hands float to my hair and one of my own clutching his shirt between my fingers in fear of never letting him go.

"You drive me crazy, you know that?" He asked me as we pulled away from one another, his fingers in my hair and was playing with the strands. I cocked an eyebrow at him.

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" I asked him backing, seeing him eye me then and I had to giggle from the look he was giving me as he was leaning in once more.

"I'll let you know." He replied before pressing his lips to me again. All was well in my world again, but I knew I had a job to do. I had to help in this battle that was coming, I had to be there somehow. Whether or not I would have my lightsaber with me was up to not only myself, but my parents.

It was time to negociate with them.

* * *

I walked over to where my mother and father were talking, out in the open of the hanger there and they were planning on moving out in a day or two with the plan. I was wanting to help, more than anything, but I knew that the both of them were going to fight me from helping out for some odd reason. It has to do with The Force, now with this Jedi helping out with The First Order, it would be looking worse for me to help out.

"General," I said to my mother as I approached the both of them now, in which they stopped their conversation with one another and looked right at me. I was in my flight jacket and black pants, boots, and my gray shirt underneath, "I want to help."

"Neyli…." My father was starting with me, but he then looked down at my hip, or what was attached to it thanks to my old holster that I had when I was training. His eyes went wide, as did my mother's eyes too. They saw it, they saw my lightsaber.

"You still have that?!" He asked me with a bit of shock there, having me want to glare at him but I hid my saber within my jacket now, almost thinking that he was wanted me to be ashamed. He then looked over at my mother, pointing to my hip in the process, "Since when does she still have that?"

"Since she did let me keep it," I replied, seeing him look back at me again now as I took a deep breath, "I'm not going to give up on a part of me that makes me feel a bit better about myself,"

"If you think you're going to use that here in the battle.." My mother said to me in almost a warning, but I cut her off this time.

"Why not? You know I can use this, and I can use it very well. This would only be a Plan B, or if you really want me to make it Plan C, in case something does go wrong," I reassured them, but I never saw any kind of thought going my way with the two of them. I made me look at them both in disbelief, and I could tell that the next question coming out of my mouth was really going to make things awkward. But I had to ask it.

"Do you guys not trust me?" It was making me look at them in a new light, my own parents thinking that I could not be trusted with a saber. I taught they knew that about me when I went into the Jedi Temple when I was younger. As soon as I said that to them, I could tell I hit something in them, having me somewhat regret asking that of them.

"Neyli," My mother finally said to me, no longer sounding like a general, but my own mother again My repaints held hands then, and it make me automatically think that something was really wrong with the both of them, "When we are done with this mission, there is something that your father and I need to tell you, something that we didn't tell you for a long time." I wanted to know what it was, what they were holding from me and were not telling me at all that was killing them both. Was one of them dying? Was something wrong with me? I could only nod my head at her and she smiled at me.

"You can fly out with the X-Wings to take out the Starkiller, but I strongly suggest that you don't use that saber," She explained to me calmly now, having me look back at the saber once more on my hip, "At least, not unless you really have to."

"Yes, ma'am," I replied to her, seeing her give me a sad smile now as she walked away from both my father and me then, having me look at her walk and see something burdening her, almost hanging on her shoulders then as my father spoke up.

"Trust me, I've had my fair shares of arguing with your mother," He said to me in a lighter tone, having me look back at him as he gave me a reassuring grin, "It never works. I think you got that toughness from her."

"What did I get from you?" I asked him back in a grin, seeing him think to himself for a moment or two before answering.

"My looks," I grinned at him then and he chuckled, having me smile at him and see him walk over to me a bit now, looking at me up and down with a twinkle there in his eyes, "I'm still seeing you as my little girl who's wanting to ride with me in the Millennium Falcon and take parts apart and place them together. I have to remind myself you're a Captain now."

"There's time for that, dad." I said to him as much as I wanted to still be aggravated with him for not telling me what was going on with him and my mother, I was seeing where he was coming from. Since Ben's death, he had to try and get through it in his own way, meaning going off on his ship and flying to who knows where. He had to think, to readjust to what he knew best, and my mother did the same with her command as the General. He missed out on some things with me, which I knew we would make up with in due time.

"I know there is, Neyli," He replied, hugging me once more in front of his ship and having me think of a good future with him.

And it was safe to say, on the eve of battle, I believed him too.


	8. Chapter 8

"They are letting you go after all?" Poe asked me as we were walking out to the runway with our X-Wings there, side by side now and our droids right behind us, having me felt he butterflies in my stomach again now from going into the new battle. This one was different, though, much different from the others we were in because this was an all or nothing kind of battle for us. I promised my mother not to use the lightsaber unless it was fully necessary, an emergency really. I was only hoping that I didn't want to use it, that my X-Wing would have to be enough for something like this.

"I'm not believing it myself," I said to him now with a small smile on my face and I was readjusting my pilot uniform then and holding my helmet in my other hand, my spare hand was tapping against my side in anticipation and in a hype really, "But I wouldn't be surprised if she will call me away from the battle out on a whim."

"I doubt that," He replied back in my direction now while we were walking together over to our paired X-Wings. The other pilots were rushing over to their planes all ready for what was going to come to all of us, "She knows we need you here for the battle."

"And we will get rid of the weapon, once and for all," I said to him in a bold and confident manner,

"Who knows, maybe this will end it all before we know it. We can live the future that we want." Poe grinned when I said this, the both of us standing between our X-Wings and staring right at each other now with a small smile on each others lips. For some reason it felt different, this felt different from the other battles that we went through together as fellow pilots. We would smile and nod at each other n the past, or sometimes press one's hand into the other as an engravement for the other to remember. I only what we were going to do after this was all over, the war and there was peace again in the galaxy.

"I know we're going to have that future we've always wanted, Neyli." He said to me in a sure thing kind of manner, our spare hands finding each other again and it made me grin there with him, "We'll have it, I promise."

"I'll hold you to it," I said back to him, sneaking in a kiss to his lips before he could say anything else. I moved away, seeing him grin at me from my kiss as I got onto my ladder leading into my X-wing. I felt the heat rush to my cheeks then, placing my hands on the ladder before I was interrupted then, by none other than my mother.

"Neyli," He said to me in an urgent manner, both Poe and I looking over at him now as my dad approached me, reaching out his hand to me and grabbing me by the arm, almost yanking me off the X-Wing and I looked at him in shock.

'What are you doing?" I asked him in wonder and in confusion as I was being hauled away from my own X-Wing. Poe even looked in confusion now, almost walking over in our direction too.

"I want you on the Millennium Falcon, with me and the kid," he said to me as I looked at him in shock, then past him at Finn who was loading some of the weapons and supplies into the vessel with a rush there within his running feet. I looked back at my father now, still not understanding what was going on with my father and what he was thinking.

"What are you talking about?" I asked him.

"I don't want you on an X-Wing that could kill you with this fight coming up," He said to me, having me glare at him as I heard Poe jogging up to stand behind him now.

"You think I'm going to get killed from it?! That's a bit rude don't you think? Have you seen your own ship there?" I asked him in a better manner then but he shook his head at me.

"I have a plan that does involve you since I know how much you really don't want to play personal bodyguard with you mother," He said to me then, having me pause at him before I could yell at him some more. It made me look at him in intrigue now, knowing that my father would aways think of the most interesting ideas for him or for others.

"I'm listening," I said to him, seeing that he let me go now and I crossed my arms in front of myself then.

"I'm taking the kid with me onto the Starkiller, to dismantle the shield like we talked about earlier, remember?" He asked, having me nod at him,"I need more hands with that, you know how to handle explosive as I remember."

"Oh please, don't bring up that one thing with the small smoke bomb when I was 12," I muttered to him under my breath.

"I need your brains out there, plus you can help with the firing too if you really wanted to," he tried to get me to come along with him and to help him along with the mission at hand It made me look over at Poe then, wondering what he was thinking about with this. He looked back at me, an uneasy look on his own face from what he was hearing. I knew my father, he knew that he was not going to throw me into something that could kill me. But then again, since I was a person that was raised on order excuse of the pilot training, it was going to be something completely different for me to get through.

"Neyli," I looked back at my father when he called me in a grave tone,"Please." He was desperate, I could see it on his face and how he was looking right at me. I knew we never had a real great moment with one another when it came to going on a mission or flying on his ship, my mother would never allow it. He needed me for this, and as much as I wanted to fly my X-Wing and work from there, I was feeling more a pull to be next to my father and help him in any way that I can.

"As long as mom doesn't know," I reassured him, seeing him smirk at me.

"She'll find out, she's a Goddamn woman," he replied back to me before he walked away back to the Millenium Falcon, having me grin at him before Poe grabbed my hand over at his now, directing my attention back at him.

"Is this going to be safe for you to go with him?" He asked me, almost sounding like he was going to have a panic attack from what he just heard me doing with my own father. I gave him a playfully shocked look, trying to make this slight more than anything.

"With my dad? Oh, come on, Poe. I'll be safe on that thing," I said to him to make him feel better, then heading a clank of something falling off the Millennium Falcon, the both of us looking and having me grimace a bit to see my dad scolding Chewbacca about the part falling off.

"Come on, Chewie, get that back on or else we'll be screwed for the hyperdrive," He said to his 1st mate, making me look back over at Poe now and I saw how green in the face he got from seeing that sight too. I made me sigh, placing my hand on his face to have him look back over at me.

"Hey," I said to him, locking eyes with him now and seeing a hint of fear there on his face. Once again, we both were trying to reconcile with one another that danger was always going to be around the corner, whether we liked it or not. We both were pilots, we both were going out to danger overtime we were in our vessels, but it seemed like this was different, and we both felt it too.

"Poe, it's going to be fine. My father would not let anything happen to me while I'm with him, and I'm going to do the same to him as well," He had to hear it coming out of my mouth, seeing it in my eyes as I looked back at him and I kept my hands along his skin to keep him at a center, 'Do you believe me?" It was the same thing that he asked me some time ago when he was telling me that he would protect me from The Dark Side. I had to let him know that I will do what I can to get back to him.

"I believe you," He replied back to me softly now, seeing where I was going with this. I smiled at him, seeing him then lean over to kiss me square on the mouth to hold it there longer than before. It was one of the more intense kisses that we have ever shared with one another, it felt so real down to my core and I did feel it all the way through. I could have sworn it was The Force, what was feeling though with huge power and force there, but it wasn't The Force at all. It was something else.

He finally pulled away from me now, resting his forehead adjacent my own and I gasped out the breath that I was holding in from his kiss on me, almost making me dizzy.

"I'll see you when I get back," I promised him.

"You better," he said to me, having em grin at him before he kissed my forehead and then I had t move away from him then since I knew they were holding up for me. I walked away from him, feeling a tug or a something else wanting me to go back to Poe, to stay with him and nothing more. But I had a job to do, and as I walked over to my father's vessel, he was watching me the whole time. I froze a bit in front of him, waiting for him to scold me for being with Poe since he didn't know about it at all. But he just cocked a grin at me.

"Never took you as a pilot type of girl any who," He said to me in a joking manner, almost cocky as I heard Chewbacca growl at him with his own words about it.

"Yeah, Chewie, she probably did get it from me."

* * *

 **Millennium Falcon**

I remembered the Falcon, seeing able to sit with my father up in the front and see through his eyes what it was like to fly. Hell, as typical as it was going to sound, my father got me into flying in the first place. I had to find some peace after Ben died, and from what I remembered with my father when I was younger, every once in awhile when he would visit us in the Temple, he would take ma flying and have me see the stars. Piloting was my therapy, my sense of anchoring and sense of healing.

I sat there with my father in the cockpit, in his 1st mate seat while Chewbacca was getting his weapons ready for the upcoming mission. I liked the sense of quiet between us, and it made me think of the years he's been gone. MY father never got over what happened to my brother, to his son. He blames himself, he really did, and for that, he flew off without a trace behind him. He left my mother and me to pick up our own fallen pieces, and for some reason, I was both relieved and furious to see him again. Relieved that he was alive, but furious from the hint of betrayal I felt in my heart.

"Its been years since we've flown together," I looked at my father when he said this, pushing a few buttons on his console now as he was looking dead ahead but still talking to me, "You always loved flying with me, more than your mother cared to admit."

"And look where I am now," I said back to him, seeing him watch me now as I was pointing to the stars ahead of me, "A Captain for the Resistance with a heart for the galaxy. Should I blame you for that?"

"Well, I think you should blame me for plenty of things," He admitted, having me feel a bit sad from how he said it like he was in pain. I knew he needed to have this kind of talk sometime soon, his absence with me and how he left without giving me a prop goodbye when I was mourning the death of my twin.

"If I'm going to blame you for anything, it's not for abandoning us," I explained to him, knowing he that thinking that very thing in his own head.

"You should be angry with me," he said to me in a lower manner, almost trying to figure me out, but I shook my head.

"I was when I was a teenager, dad. I was mad at how I was hurting from losing my twin brother and you bolted, going back to what you do best," I explained to him calmly.

"Stealing and being a smuggler?" He asked bitterly as if he hated calling himself that now, making me shake my head at him now and placed a hand on his arm.

"Being an adventurer," I replied to him, seeing him watch me with new eyes now as I went on, "There was a part of me that wanted to go with you, to go see the universe and get away from all of the pain I was feeling. I wanted to ask you if I could go, but I figured I would be leaving mom too. I had to grow up to realize that I had to deal with this on my own and not in a way that would kill me from the inside out."

"Let me guess, your Uncle taught you that?" He asked me now as he pushed a few more buttons there on the console. I had to smile, not realizing that he missed the point there as I jabbed my finger into his arm.

"You taught me that," I remind him, seeing him pause and then look back at me. Those years being gone, being away from my mother and me, I could see it in his eyes. He wanted to come back, he really wanted to, but he never had the heart to face the both of us if he did. He was ashamed, beaten up by the death of his son, suffocating from the knowledge that there was nothing he could do to save him, and in fear that he was going to be shunned by the rest of his family because of it.

"We'll make up for lost time, Neyli," He promised me, taking my hand in his and having me feel the calloused fingers and palm against my own calloused hand, "We'll make it work when this whole thing's over." I knew he was trying, really trying, to fix what he broke. He lost one child, and I could tell in ti eyes and how he was holding my hand that he didn't want to loose the other child anytime soon while he was still alive. I nodded in agreement, wanting that more than anything as we realized our hands and focused back on the stars in front of us.

"Besides, I wanna hear more about you and that one pilot you were kissing," He said to me in an amused tone, having me blush slightly from how he said it and he gave me a humorous look there, "How long has that been going on?"

"If you're going to start your Protective Dad kind of talk with me, you've missed it by a decade," I said to him as I pushed another button on his console, seeing him roll his eyes, "And his name is Poe Dameron if you were curious."

"Oh, the dangerous cocky pilot I've heard about that's the best in the Resistance?" He asked me in a hint of a smile there.

"He's not cocky, not that much," I countered, "And yes, he is the best pilot under my mother's command."

"Your mother's command, or yours?" He asked me back in a chuckle, "Honestly, though, I never took you as someone going after another pilot."

"Didn't that happen with mom and you?" I asked him, looking over at him and grinning from ear to ear, "How did you get mom to talk to you? Your grin, or how to swooned her?"

"I'm still confused myself, Neyli," He reasoned with a shrug of his shoulders, "But if you like this guy, really like him, then I want you to be happy with him."

"I am, more than any other time," I admitted with a soft tone and smile there my lips. It seemed morbid to talk about my love life with my dad, but then again, he wanted to know what was going on with me since he's been gone and away from me. I wanted him to know that I was okay with Poe, that nothing was holding me away from him and keeping me away from him in due time.

"Besides, he thinks you're a war hero." I voiced to my father, seeing him cock an eyebrow at me in amusement and in shock.

"Really?" he asked, having em giggle.

"Yeah, but mom's been his idol since he was a boy," I replied, seeing his gruff come back to play again and I had to laugh.

"Your mom's more popular than me," he said, almost defeated.

"Can't imagine why."


	9. Chapter 9

**Just for you guys, here's a smal snippet of a chapter featuring the Point of View of Poe! PLEASE leave me a review on how I'm doing with the story! Thanks for reading, enjoy :)**

* * *

 **Poe's POV**

All my life I've wanted to be a pilot.

My mother was a Lieutenant pilot in the war against the Galactic Empire, my father, a Sergeant, helped the cause too. I guess you can say that it was within my own blood to fly and be amongst the stars. Even as a little boy I was always looking up at the sky at night, thinking that one day that I would be up there in my own ship, going from one end of the galaxy to the other side with ease.

I had high hopes

I hardly saw them when I was little, they both were fighting in the Battle of Endor with the Rebel Alliance and I was left in the care of my grandfather, my mother's father. I was far too young to remember anything at that time, only the thoughts of my parents being away for so long made me stay up at night or be sad every once in awhile.

Finally, when they came home with the victory of the war on our side, we settled down on Yavin 4, a moon colony and my father built us a home. I remember there being plenty of green, tall trees like the jungle that surrounded our home, plenty of flowers of colors and sizes. It was one of the better memories of my homes that I would always remember.

One of the more distinct memories I had when I was growing up was the Force Sensitive Tree in our backyard. It was a gift, from Luke Skywalker himself to my parents in their aid with the war, and I watched it grow as the years went by into the large tree it was today. My mother told me the stories of the Jedi, how they were meant to keep the peace of the galaxy and those who lived there. it almost seemed like a wise man's tall when she would tell me, like a dream that could never be a reality now since most of the Jedi knights were killed off if not all but Luke Skywalker himself.

By the time I was 6, I got my hands on my mother's old RZ-1 A-wing interceptor. She saw me peeking at it from the garage, where I was not supposed to go on my own. I knew why later in life, but at the time, I was more curious than anything. I thought she would be angry with me on how I was not listening to her rules, but she decided to take me up in the interceptor. I would sit on her lap and she would teach me which button was for what purpose and how to steer. Those moments, with my mother, were also memories that would make me both miss her, and praise her. She was kind, a veteran fighter who was stern at times, but she was still my mother first and foremost in my heart.

When she died when I was 8, it didn't feel the same without her, without my mother there who taught me how to fly in the first place. My poor father, he was heartbroken and not the same since then. He tried to raise me still, and he was good at it too. But it was still not the same, there was a hole in our home because of my mother being gone.

I still miss her.

When I got old enough I decided to be a pilot once and for all, joining the New Republic Starfleet. A new adventure was waiting for me, I knew it was going to be a challenge from the moment I got the base. But it was all I thought it would be, training to fly X-wings, working with other hopefuls like me, and going on plenty of patrols around other planets to stop piracy and illegal trading. Slowly I moved up through the ranks and became a Commander, even being assigned to astromech droid BB-8. He was the best buddy a human like me could have in a droid. We've bene through a lot in missions and patrols, and I wouldn't want any other droid to help me along the way.

After some time, General Organa got a hold me and recruited me to help her cause with the Resistance, in which I went without hesitation. She was a well-known General, she was there through the battle and war that my parents were in, she led the way for them and she brought the victory. There was no one else like General Organa, and I was glad I was under her command.

It was that same year I met Neyli Organa-Solo.

I would never put the two of them together and consider them family, but there are some things to her and make me think that they are mother and daughter. But I think the one thing that caught me to Neyli, was how she was firm within herself and yet kind. Seeing her for the first time in the cafeteria, and hearing those things that the other soldiers were saying about her that made my blood boil, it made me look at her in a new light to see that she could, and did, hold her own.

I think too, it was the color of her hair that drew me to her. It was both brown and red, melting together to almost remind me of the color of copper. It was beautiful, and for the first time in my life when I was not afraid to speak my mind, I was tongued tied with her. I didn't know whether it was her smile that made it happen, or that she was so approachable with me with her kindness and friendliness, but it got hard to tell her how I felt about her.

Too damn hard.

Of course, she had to be the daughter of General Organa, and after I realized that with our first meeting, I was more surprised. She seemed too kind to be the Genera's daughter, and too down to earth since she never spoke of it or flaunted it in front of the others. I would tend to forget, from time to time when we would talk to laugh together, who her family was and whom she called her mother. But I loved our talks, our stories of our childhood and our ambitions of being pilots in the future, those times was my favorite when we would talk.

Of course I had a crush on her, I had to be honest with myself.

The more time we spent together, the more I talked with her and learned she loved the color yellow like the sun and how she preferred green tea over anything, the more I was willing to be closer and closer to her. Even through the rough times, we were helping each other, my father's death, her moments of missing her brother, we were each other's support more than anyone else that we knew. Through rough days at the hanger, and even sleepless nights sitting on top of the X-Wing and talking about our dreams, Neyli and I were becoming inseparable.

* * *

 **3 years ago**

"Come on Poe, tell us!" I was sitting with the other pilots there in the cafeteria, all of us were talking with one another and having another round of meaningless conversation. Neyli was across from me, watching me and eating at the same time and for some reason, the topic was dating. I didn't want to be the center of it when it comes to the talk of conversation, but there I was.

"What do you wanna know?" I asked him in a small smile, thinking that they were just going to give it up and leave it. Janco was next to Neyli, they too were close friends. I knew Janco was a good supporter of Neyli when it came to her training and going through the ranks. He was eve reluctant of me when I met Neyli and got close to her, so I knew he was going to be protective of her when it came to her heart. They had their own kind of friendship that I would never compete with. Ever.

I had to tell the group something to get them off my back once and for all, either that or let them know that I was developing feelings for another pilot, who happened to be sitting across from me and was watching me, seeing what I was going to say.

"I mean, I'm not interested in anyone at the moment," I replied, thinking that I was going to avoid the awkwardness there, but it was when I locked eyes with Neyli that I knew I broke that within her. She was so still, holding her fork delicately in her hand and was staring right at me to see if it was true. I smiled, thinking that I was going to hide it even from her, but no avail.

She was wrecked internally.

"Excuse me," She said in a small tone, getting up from the table as the others were talking to one another. Janco watched her with worry as I was still stuck there within my own spot, immediately hating myself for saying that to the group and not having the balls to say what I wanted.

"Neyli?" Janco asked her now in worry as she walked away from the group, a walk that I knew she was holding back a run but she was not looking back at the both of us then. Janco got up too, jogging after her as I was down with it, throwing down my fork in frustration and feeling like total crap.

What was wrong with me?

* * *

I couldn't sleep that night in my bunker, still feeling better about it and how I basically told her off in front of her and though the others didn't catch on, I knew she did. The walls were filled with posters of old X-Wings from the past, other models and plants that I visited, and a couple of pictures from home of my mother and father. Something I would look at those items on the wall, I would feel much better. But that was not the case today.

I knew she caught on with what I said, and it felt like I had to really fix what I broke. I was sitting there at my desk, looking back at some of the pictures that I took of her and the others in our squads throughout out training and between missions. One of my more favorite pictures was between Neyli and me, laughing at a joke that I told her to get her to smile at the camera.

She never liked being photographed, she was shyer than anything. Neyli had her nose wrinkled in, head tilted on my shoulder as I was laughing, looking right at her as she was looking right at the camera with those eyes, freckles on her nose and her hair flowing in the wind.

Something tapped my leg, having me finally looked down and see BB-8, whizzing right at me and tapping my leg with his talk.

"I'm not tired, you should go to bed," I said to him, but he shook his head and chirped at me again in a more excited manner, "No, no I don't like her."

 _Beep beep!_

"No, I don't!"

 _Beep!_

"I'm not going to have this argument with you, BB-8! She doesn't like me," I said to him now as I got up from my desk in frustration now, some of the pictures coming off the surface of the desk and floating back down to the floor then, having me hear BB-8 whiz at me once more and I looked down at him. He was looking at the picture of Neyli and I, almost like a curious little droid that he was, and then he looked up at me. Sometimes BB-8 knew more and more about me than I knew of myself, and it was the same thing this time. He knew, as much as I both tried to deny it or just bury it, he knew I liked Neyli.

"I'm not good enough for her anyways," I said to him in a mutter as I went over to sit on my bed then and rub my hand across my face. I had to face it, I didn't think I was really that great for someone like Neyli, whom I thought was a real leader and great friend. But for the both of us, it wouldn't have felt right for us to be together. I was too cocky, too much of a man who would fly off the seat of my pants. She was careful, a bit of the reckless side with a hint of a temper, but I thought she was far too good in my eyes.

BB-8 rolled over to be next to my leg then, beeping once more at me and I looked down at him, seeing him look back and rest his head against my leg. I grinned at him, patting him on the head.

"Thanks, buddy."

* * *

Even after we kissed a year later and kept it secret, just looking at her from then on made me smile, no matter where I was and what I was doing. I knew I shifted, all from that kiss I gave her under the Force-Sensitive Tree at my home, and she shifted too. We would hold hands when we got the chance, kiss each other goodnight after I would walk her to her sleeping quarters. It was simple, it was what we both needed.

But for me, it shifted again when I was standing with her side by side and we were watching the fireworks show that they were doing in the celebrating of the anniversary for the Battle of Endor. We were remembering those who have fallen, those who fought, and those who helped in the victory. We both watched the sky was lit in colors, the others cheering around us and we both were just watching in silence. I wanted to cheer, to shout out my praise for the battle that my parents fought in so long ago, but I was too enraptured with the girl next to me, holding my hand and was watching the sky with her big beautiful eyes.

It was then, in that moment of seeing the color on her face and in her eyes, it was then that I fell.

I fell in love with her.

* * *

 **Present Day**

The Millennium Falcon flew off, all of us were watching and I was in the back with Jancon, the pair of us watching with a hint of worry. We both knew Nyeli could handle herself, I knew it more than anyone there in that hanger, But it was still making me nervous to see her, watching her fly away from me instead of next to me where I knew where she was. She was bold, she knew how to hold her ground in a mission or in her X-Wing, so why was it now that I was worried about her? We never worried about each other since we both were good enough to get through the day.

"She'll be fine, Poe," Jancon reassured me, placing his hand on my shoulder then. I nodded in agreement but I didn't say a word.

"You sound sure of yourself," I said to him in almost a factorial tone.

"What? You doubt her now?" Jancon asked me with a hint of intrigue there in his voice. I looked at him too, seeing him give me an amused look, "Don't be surprised, Poe. I knew you two were together since you brought her back from your house a couple of years back."

"How?" I asked him in a shocked manner but keeping my voice down as the others around us were getting ready for the mission ahead. Jancon just grinned at me.

"Because I know Neyli, and she's been happier since you came along, very much happier," He replied, slapping me on the shoulder then and walking away before I could say anything else to him. It made me look back at the sky where I knew she disappeared to. I did love her, more than I loved flying an X-Wing or the thrill of ebbing with the Resistance. With all that she's been through for the past few days, I only wished that there was some way that I could help her more and more.

Neyli Organa-Solo would be the death of me, but I still loved her.


	10. Chapter 10

"You okay there, Neyli?" My dad asked me, having me still look dead ahead now as we were in hyperdrive at that point, so close to being at Starkiller and having me look over the plans that were in my hand of the planet, and almost have a lump in my throat. I felt like I was about to go in over my head with what we are about to, and then again I would be thinking the same thing if I was in my X-Wing. This was different, though, very different within my own mind.

"I didn't realize how big it was," I said to him in a low tone now, hearing footsteps behind me and I would think it was both Chewbacca and Finn, seeing the planet there. it almost made a pit in my stomach there from how I was feeling. This was the very first time that I was scared, out of all the missions that I have been one, this one had to me the most important and the most dangerous.

"We can handle this," My father reminded me now as we were getting closer and closer to the planet then, even if it was a planet or not. I could see how the plant looked, the middle with the wide opening must have been where the weapon was and I got a great look at it. It made me sick think about the power of that weapon and how it was able to destroy a whole planet. And we had to disable it? Oh no.

"Neyli," My father called me again now as I finally looked over at him. I didn't know why this was finally affecting me now, but from what I could see on my father's face and how he was looking at me with confidence there, I knew he was not going to have me panic over this.

"We can handle this, you know that, right?" He asked me now, seeing me there next to him and I finally breathed out. It was better for me to be there with my father. If he was going to be confident, then I had to be confident too. I was a Captain! I had to make sure I was going through with this. I nodded at him, looking back at Finn who was watching me the whole time before I saw his own eyes going to my own hip, right where my saber was.

"You know how to use that?" He asked me, having me get up and grab it within my hand there to show it to him. He was looking at it in amazement now, almost like Poe did when he saw my own saber the first time.

"I was uhh, trained in using it when I was little," I explained to him, feeling the saber within my fingers there and holding it up for him to see it more clearly. He then slowly looked down at something within his own pocket, making me look to see him take it out slowly. My eyes went wide, I lost my breath again because I knew fully well what it was in his hand.

Uncle Luke's lightsaber.

"Where did you get that?" I asked him in a small voice but still in shock.

"Maz had it, don't ask me how, but she had it all along since your Uncle disappeared." my father explained as Finn held that saber to me. I knew ti well, my Uncle never parting with it once whether he was teaching with us or using it on his own as a demonstration. It pulled on my heart than to see it in front of me, another thing to look at and remind me of my Uncle and how he was not there to be with us.

"You're a Jedi, aren't you?" He asked me with hope in his tone since he was looking at my own again. I could tell why he would think that, how I was holding my own saber like it was nothing, it would automatically assume that I was a Jedi. But then again, I never really considered myself a Jedi, or I haven't in a long time since I was a teenager.

"I used to be, a long time ago," I admitted to him, clutching my saber a bit tightly thin as the thought of a lot dream of being a Jedi. Sure, when I was younger and that dream seemed more like a reality than anything, but, after all, I went through, the dream was farther than a reality.

"Can you show me how to use this?" He asked me, motioning to Uncle Luke's saber then with hope there in his voice and in his eyes. I looked from my own saber to him now with a knitted look of confusion there on my face. I barely knew the young man in front of me, and yet he wanted me to teach him all that I knew of the saber. Was I up for something like that? Was I ever worthy enough?

"I'm not a Jedi Master, and I haven't practiced in years," I tried to explain to him in order for him to see it from my point of view.

"I just need to know the basics," he reassured me then, having me still feel like it might be a bad idea for me. I was never one to doubt my own strength when it came to The Force, I was always fine with it. But then again, I was also cautious, not wanting to throw it to the end t see where it would land. I was the one who would tread on careful waters, took everything carefully and wholeheartedly. It was the opposite of Ben, who was in it with all or nothing at all. That was the one thing that was opposite about the both of us, reckless versus cautious, bold versus neutral, intense versus calm. Maybe that was his downfall, or my own if I was going to be honest.

"After we do this and go back to base, I can show you the basics," I said to him, thinking it was not right for me to refuse something like this to him when he wanted it more etna anything. I saw the smile there on his face, it was filled with such innocence that it madam wonder even more where he came from. There was no real damage seen on his face,e not enough to put w wrinkle in his history.

"Thank you Neyli." He replied to me, having me place my saber back on my hip then and smile back at him.

"You're quite welcome, Finn."

* * *

Planet Starkiller

"You call that a landing?" I asked my father as we exited the Millennium Falcon, having my ear coat on and a rifle in and, saber on my hip and the cold hitting me all over my face then. My father sighed at me as the doors closed behind us and the ramp rose, all four of us standing there in the snow outside the ship and looking around to see where we were going to go from there. My father had the brilliant plan to come into the planet at Hyperdrive to fool them and for them to not see us, and it seems great….when he said it. We crashed coming in low, but we were all in one piece.

"We are all alive, aren't we?" He asked me as I rolled my eyes at him and we jogged now, following Finn to where he was leading us. The planet was cold, almost too cold for my liking as we were going through the snow and the slopes that the planet was giving us. I looked around a bit more, wondering where we were going and if we were even going to get out of this one alive and in once piece.

Finally, we stopped near once of the clearing and hid behind one of the structures, looking around the corner now to see where Finn was pointing at, the main area of the black structure there contrasting with the snow. We all looked, having me see how big the area was and how the fours of us were going to get in there and not get lost.

"The flooding tunnels are over that ridge. We'll get in that way." Finn explained to us now as my father looked at him.

"What was your job when you were here?" he asked Finn.

"Sanitation," both my father and I looked at him in shock then.

"Sanitation? Then how do you know how to disable the shields?" He asked in a bit of a heated manner.

"I don't," I could have sworn I saw my father almost pop a blood vessel then,"I'm just here to get to Rey."

"People are counting on us! The galaxy is counting on us—" My father was about to lose it from Finn. Finn wanted to get his friend, which would be understandable if we weren't in this kind of predicament right now and It too got me a bit worried now as I walked out a bit and looked at the are again, sharing them talk to each other how in an argument. Well, my father was mostly arguing and Finn was trying to prove a point.

"Solo, we'll figure it out! We'll use the Force!" Finn said with such hope, having me look back at him and feel my hair whipping in the cool crisp wind. My father gave him a sour look then from what he heard.

"That's not how the Force works!" He said to him, in which cause I said enough.

"Gentlemen!" I said to them both, seeing them while their heads in my direction now as I pointed to the structure with my finger, "Let's just get in there and go from there. We can find a way to disable the shield, at least, I can if you tow are not going to yell at each other." We had no time for this, for them arguing with one another and trying to find out who was lying and who was telling the truth. No, we had a war on our hands and we had to do our part, there was no turning back now. Finn looked at me reluctantly since he could tell I was not going to me letting on this anytime soon. I was already here on the planet, might as well do what I was supposed to do.

Chewbacca at that point mumbled a bit at my father, who rolled his eyes at him.

"Oh really? You're cold?"

* * *

Poe's POV

Planet D'Qar

I was pacing back and forth there at that base since we weren't supposed to be flying out until we knew it was time for us to get there when the shield was disabled and we had the open opportunity to attack. But the longer it took, at least in my mind, the more my mind was racing about Neyli, how she was out there with Finn, her father, and his 1st mate, going on a mission that seemed more dangerous than anything. Finn knew how to get in there and take out the shield, and apparently he needed Neyli with him.

Why did she have to go?

BB-8 rolled up end to me then, having me also see Q2 with him and he beeped at me in a nervous way. Since Neyli left on the Falcon, Q2 was growing more and more nervous without Neyli there and without his master.

"She'll be fine, you'll see," I reassured them both, looking back at the map of Starkiller now and seeing General Organa walk up next to me, her eyes on the map too and I looked over at her. I had to wonder, really wonder, what she was thinking about in that moment since she just found out that her daughter left with her husband on his ship and was not here waiting like the rest of the pilots.

"She's a bit restless, isn't she?" The General asked me out of the blue, having me not know what to say to her since it seemed so random. She finally looked over at me, staring at me right in the eyes then and having me think I was almost looking like Neyli for a moment or two.

"General?" I asked her now, not following.

"You know who I'm talking about, Poe." She said to me in her sure tone of voice, I looked back at the map then, thinking of Neyli again and having a small smile on my lips.

"She can never sit still, not even through a training program," I agreed with her.

"I blame myself for that," General Organa explained now, between the both of us as we were standing there side by side against the war room table, "But then again, I could never have her sit still myself when she was young. But I feel like this is a different situation with her, very different."

"She knows what she's doing," I said almost in a bold manner to General Organa, but I kept it in check then. I knew then that I had to defend Neyli, even if it meant telling it to her mother that Neyli was fine being on her own in a new scenario. General Organa looking at me again as I was looking at the map with my own eyes and trying not to say anything else to her.

"You think she does?" She asked me, not being clueless about it from what I could tell, but I could really feel like she was just making sure what I was doing there defending her daughter in front of her.

"I know she does," I said in a hint of confidence there as I was looking over the Starkiller planet schematics again with my eyes and crossing my arms in front me in almost a defense kind of manner, "Neyli has been in tougher spots than this, she can handle her own." I could see her cock a grin at me from the corner of my eye, it almost made me uneasy to see that on her face and how she was not being mote hostile with me because of her daughter the topic of conversation.

"She considers you a good ally, Poe Dameron," She explained to me with kindness there in her voice, having me finally look over at her now. I always looked up to her, since I aIways thought of her as a hero of mine. I would never think that I would be side by side with her, talking to her about her daughter and the fact that I have feelings for her daughter, being in love with her. Did General Organa even have a clue as to how I felt about her? it seemed dangerous if she did know, I would be kicked out here before I knew. Dating the General's daughter in secret was bad enough, but both Neyli never wanted to have others know. Jancon was the only one, and he was never going to tell any who.

"She is a good ally to me, General." I said in agreement to her now as she nodded at me, a firm look on her face then as I said that to her and loosen my arms in front of me, "And I can rely on her for anything that does happen to me in the future."

"No wonder she speaks highly of you," I gave her a confusing look, wondering what she was meaning by this now as she grinned at me, a small grin that was there on her face and it almost made am uncomfortable for her to smile at her, since she would hardly smile about anything.

"Thank you, General," I replied to her hesitantly, not thinking of what else to say to her. She moved away from the table then, the grin was still on her face like she knew something that I didn't know at all. What did she know now? It kind of had me on edge again as I looked back at the map, seeing that the Millennium Falcon finally landed on the planet and I breathed in deeply.

She was on her own now.

* * *

Neyli's POV

Planet Starkiller

The doors opened, the four of us standing there and there was a stormtrooper on the other side of the doors, about to shoot at us as Chewie shoots at him first, seeing him fly back and hit the wall in a bang now as we rushed into the corridor. I looked around, rifle in hand to make sure we were safe and sound as Chewie dragged the stormtrooper away now by his feet. It was one thing for us to be outside looking at the base, but it was another being in the base itself now and thinking that we were going to be caught at any moment.

"The longer we're here, less luck we're going to have. The shields?" I heard my father as Finn now as I looked back over at the both of them.

"I have an idea about that," Finn explained now as he then lead the way around the corner and down the hallway a bit. I was joining them, right behind Chewie now as we were doing down the hallways a bit and Finn pointed to the room on the right there, "There's a workstation in here that is in charge of the shields. But wench's do it on our own, I know who we can grab."

"Neyli, wait in there until we get back," my father said to me, having me nod in agreement since this was really not my kind of deal any who. I moved into the smaller hallway and room as they went on, having me take a breath and see that was once again alone and having my own thoughts come into play I didn't know where we were going to find Rey, how we were going to get this mission through in one piece. I was never this close to the enemy, let alone being on the planet. It made me close my eyes and try to center myself again now, having to try and use The Force to find my peace again in a place like this since something could go wrong within seconds. I had to keep my head in the center again, to not worry about what was going to happen and tell myself that I knew what I was doing.

Another set of steps was heard coming my way, sounding a bit more rushed that I thought. I looked around the corner carefully now as I saw Chewie bringing over a unique looking stormtrooper into the room and Finn and my father right behind him. Instead of covered in shite, the soldier had a bit of a chrome finish to him, along with a cap. It made me think that the stormtrooper was more of an officer I was a bit shocked from seeing the stormtrooper there in front of me and Chewie shoving him into the chair there, facing the panel that was on control of the shield.

"You want me to blast that bucket off your head? Lower the shield." Finn said to the soldier.

"You're making a big mistake." The soldier, sounding more like a woman than I thought.

"Do it," Finn practically growled at the soldier, Chewie agreeing with him now as Chewie shoved the stormtrooper a bit now as the soldiers reluctantly pushed a few buttons and I looked on the screen, seeing the works SHIELD DISABLE INITIATE.

"Solo, if this works, we're not going to have a lot of time to find Rey," Finn explained to my father.

"Don't worry kid, we won't leave her without her." My father reassured him now as I heard the click on the panel. It made me look again now, seeing another set of words there on the screen in big red letters. SHIELDS DISABLED. The stormtrooper finally got up from the chair and faced us, having me throw up my rifle at her in case she was going to start something there with us.

"You can't be so stupid as to think this will be easy. My troops will storm this block and will kill you." She said to him in a sneer now as Finn got his own rifle in her face, standing next to her and grabbing her tight to not have her to anywhere. I was still holding my rifle close to me and aiming at her

"I disagree," Finn said back to her before looking back at both my father and I, "What do we do with her?"

"Is there a garbage chute? Trash compactor?" The stormtrooper's head snapped in panic as Han said this, having me smile from how he was making this recommendation.

"Yeah there is," Finn said in agreement and a small smile was back on his face.

So far, we were in the clear and it was going to be fine.


	11. Chapter 11

"We'll use the charge to blow that blast door. I'll go in and draw fire, but I'm gonna need cover," Finn was talking the plan with my father as I was waiting near Chewie and he had a duffle over his shoulder, grabbing the explosives there and getting them ready for our new part of the mission.

"You sure you're up for this?" Han asked Finn.

"Hell no, I'll go first and try to find Rey," He explained as I saw Chewie look over at me with a curious look about him now while Finn was still talking, "The troopers'll be on our tail. We have to be ready for that. There's a tunnel that'll lead—" Chewie was talking to me again, having me see him point got the duffle bag of explosives that he had there within his hand and I gave him questioning look when he was talking to me then.

"I have no idea who to work those, Why did you bring them anyways?" I asked him, hearing him talk about to me and I glared at him, "Don't throw my father under the bus! I told you, it was one time!"

"Hey! You two!" We both looked back at Han and Finn, in which Finn was watching something in the other direction and Han was looking at the both of us like he caught us in a squabbling act, "Get it together, we found Rey! Come on!" I sighed in relief from what I heard, but I looked back at Chewie and pointed at him.

"Don't get me started on you!" I said to him, hearing him mumble at me back as we both got back over to Han and Finn. I saw Rey too, on the other side of what looked like a big gap. She was climbing up the side of the wall with ease, almost like wherever she was before we were intertwined with our lives, she's done it there. I grinned, looking at Finn who looked like he was in relief from seeing his friend there. It made me clasped my own hand on his shoulder there.

"I told you we would find her," I reminded him, seeing him finally look over at me and the warmth was back there on his face. It was nice to have a moment or two or peace there, even on an enemy planet and a lot hanging on our shoulders, I could tell he needed that moment.

We all needed that moment.

* * *

Finally, we are able to reach her and she found her along the 6th corridor, a weapon out in front of her like she was afraid that someone was going to blow her up into bits. After a moment or two of the friend reuniting and embracing one another, Han decided to get us moving with the mission on hand since we were still being looked at from the home base. We finally got out of the base, trying to get our way back over to the Millennium Falcon and get off the planet before all hell would break loose. Once again, we were out in the cold and I was feeling the soldier water now, not to mention it was darker outside. We all looked, the five of us, out in the cold opening at the fighting that was above us in the sky. X-Wings, TIE Fighters, all of whom are battling each other and the sound was deafening. I instantly thought of one person that was up there, and it was making my heart ache.

Poe.

"They're in trouble. We can't leave," Han said in a grave manner now as we were all watching the sky and now realizing that it was not in our favor anymore. We were losing the battle, even with the shields down, "My friend here as a bag full of explosives, let's use them." I looked back at Han now as Rey and Finn did too. This was getting more and more crucial on our part, and I thought it would be simple. Of course, it wouldn't be simple when we were going to be something like this. It made me look back up at the sky again, to see where I can locate Poe and his X-Wing in hopes that he was still alive. He had to be alive, he was not one to give up easily. I was still worried, though, very worried for him.

"Chewy and I will get in there and set the explosives up," Han explained to us now as we were meeting together within our own small circle,"We need a way to get into the hatch without being seen or heard."

"I can help with that!" Rey said to him in a hopeful manner.

"I'll go with her," Finn agreed as Han then looked over at me.

"I want you to go with Rey and Finn," he said to me, having me look at him in confusion.

"What about you?" I asked him in wonder since I would figure he would want me to be near him in case something does happen. It didn't make sense for me to separate from my father, and for some odd reason, I didn't want to leave his side after not being around him for so many years.

"You kidding? I can handle myself, along with Chewie here," he said to me almost in a light manner, but he was reading my face then, almost looking like I was being betrayed there in front of him and being pushed to the side. Why was I getting the sick feeling that this was not the best idea for me to be away from him? It felt unpleasant in my stomach, and he could see it in how I was staring at him with an almost open mouth.

"I can be fine on my own, Neyli. I want you to take care of the kid and Rey," He reassured me then, both Rey and Finn were silent but looking at me too to see my own reaction there, "I can take care of myself, don't worry about me." I was still not buying it, thinking that something bad was going to happen with him and it was going to be because I wasn't there next to him. He knew how to his own in a fight, he did it plenty of times before Ben and I came along. But still, it felt uneasy within my head then as I just nodded at him. I knew that no matter how much I would ask him to not do this, to not leave my sight, my own father had his stubborn side. I inherited that from him, more than my mother.

"Come on, we need to go now," Finn said to both Rey and me as the pair of them started to jog off over to where we were going to go in and help with the doors. I kept my eyes on my father one more time, to hopes that the image of him in front of me was not going to go away anytime soon. I gave him a reassuring smile, hoping that it would make me feel better.

"Love you, dad," I said to him, not knowing why I said it or how it sounded a bit more on the desperate side. But I had to say it, thinking that it would make me feel worse if I didn't. Plus, I haven't said that to him in years on end, so it felt good to say it to him then.

"Love you too, Neyli," he said it with warmth there in his own tone, having me feel a bit better about the situation more than anything, "It'll be okay."

God, I wished I believed him.

* * *

"How do we get them to open?" Finn asked Rey as the pair of them were looking at a panel near the junction station, the opening into the cold was right behind us as I was keeping watch. Rey opened the panel, having me look over my corner and see the mechanics inside where she was rooting around inside to grab something there. I was still thinking about my father, how he was off to plant the explosives with Chewie, and it still felt I should be with him and not here as a bodyguard.

Rey yanked on something within the panel, which apparently was successful for us as she grinned and I looked back in front of me, a couple of stormtroopers were there about to shoot us, having me panic and take up my rifle at the ready.

"Rey and Finn! Find cover!" I said to them both as I got one stormtrooper and the other was about to shoot at me when I ducked, shooting t him back. But it was not in my favor, for the blast that came from the stormtrooper knocked my rifle from my hand and it fell to the floor in a heap. I felt it move out of my hands and I was about to reach down to grab the rifle when another shot was fired, blocking me from getting the rifle itself.

"Neyli!" said in fear as the stormtrooper shot right at me, having me think of nothing else to do but throw my own hand out at him, thinking that it would do something there. And it did, for some miraculous reason, I found the Stormtrooper as I gasped out in pain there, along my rib and near my ship there. He was stuck, I had him stuck with my use of The Force since it was a last ditch effort for me to make sure he wasn't going to hit either Finn or Rey.

"Neyli?" I heard Rey behind me, having me still hold onto what strength I had in that moment now as I was concentrating on the stormtrooper and I released him, seeing him fall to the ground in a heap and was out cold. I sighed, lowering my arm then as both Finn and Rey ran over to stand in front of me.

"How did you do that?! That was amazing!" Finn said to me in a wanderlust kind of tone as Rey looked down and then grasped his arm to stop talking, Finn looking at her in confusion as to what was was wrong, but when he looked as well where she was gazing her eyes, he looked shocked too. It made me look, knowing what was there and I grunted in pain.

I was shot in the side.

"Neyli, you're hurt," Rey said in almost a worried manner as I examined it. A clean cut though my side, enough to contain damage if not treated, but not enough to kill me. I could feel the burn though my damaged jacket, the small smell of burned skin came through my nose as I tried to breathe, feeling as though it was the hardest thing to do at that point. I shook my head, not wanting my own injury to slow us down at that point and I grabbed my saber in my spare hand there.

"It's nothing, we have other things to worry about right now," I explained to them both, and they were looking more scared about it than anything, "I can handle this, we need to keep going with the plan."

"That could be nasty if we don't treat it," Finn tried to reason with me.

"Which is why we better do this quick and make sure we do it right, don't we?" I asked them both, seeing them look at each other and reluctantly agree now. I was not going to slow them down when I knew my father and Chewie were waiting for us. I smiled at them, the pain was still there but I knew I could handle it for now. Finn was right, if I was not going to treat it soon, then I would be screwed. But we had bigger things to fret over. I could then hear more stormtroopers coming our way, the three of us looking over in that direction and I clicked the saber on, the yellow beam coming through and my stance got a bit more protective.

"We should go. Now." I said to the two of them, all three of us now bolting over to the opening. Running with my wound was a pain, literally, since it felt more I was losing more air in my lung than what I was taking in. This pain was more of an aching pain then, but it was going to have me lose my energy and that was not what I wanted in that moment.

But we went outside yet again, having me grunt out in pain because of the cold wind hitting my open wound now and I tried not to show it too much. The sun was nearly gone at this point, the darkness was taking over and making it known that we were still running out of time before the superweapon was ready to be used. We were on a deadline, and we were not going to be alone anytime soon.

"Come on, this way!" Finn said to us, having me follow him now as I was looking behind me every once in awhile to make sure we were having distance there between us and the upcoming stormtroopers. I saw three of them coming our way, trying to shoot at us now as they were shooting at us. I whirled around, stopping my running and blocked the blasts with my saber, deflecting them to make sure not one was going to hit either Finn or Rey. One of the blasters that I defect went back and hit one in the head, the other two were still firing at me now as Finn and Rey looked back at me.

"Go on! Find my father and Chewie!" I said to them both, deflating more and more of the lasers that were coming my way. I could hear them running on, having me slowly walk over in the direction of the two stormtroopers to stop this once and for all. My mother would be ripping me a new one if she knew I was using my saber there on an enemy planet. I never thought I would be using this too, and to think how I was no longer a pilot.

But now I was a Jedi.

"Tell Kylo Ren, there's another Jedi—" I struck through the last stormtrooper as he was talking into his communicator, seeing him fall to the floor and having me look at the two dead stormtroopers there in the snow. I was breathing in deeply, every breath out of my lungs was another shot of pain down my spine and on my side there. It was getting worse, I could feel it, and I could feel how The Force was flowing through me again, having me slowly look over to where I knew Finn and Rey went off to.

It was like the forest all over again, back to when I saw the Jedi for the first time. The same feeling, the washing of wave after wave of The Force coming over me and almost summoning me to go to the source. Apparently, it was in the same area of the building where I was supposed to go in the first place, having me retract my saber and walk over there to see whatever there was to be seen. However, at this point, it was more for a limp than a walk since the wound was feeling worse and worse now. I could collapse at any moment really, from how I was feeling and how it was digging into my skin to make me want to scream.

Still, I trekked on.

* * *

I finally got inside, thinking that I got out the worst of it, but then again I would have to look over my shoddier even once in awhile now as my was now being hunted down by others on the planet. I knew the message from the stormtrooper got out just in time, too late for me to stop it now as I saw nothing but darkness around me, having me wonder where the others were. But then again, I heard some voices far away, having me think that I could head in that direction and see if I was going to run into the others were.

"I'm being torn apart. I want to be free of this pain…" someone was talking to another person as I was trying to creep through the hallway without being detected or seen. I didn't know where I was or what was going on, but I felt like I was being guided to someplace important, getting closer and closer now and feeling more and more of the weight within me.

"I know what I have to do, but I don't know if I have the strength to do it. Will you help me?" Whoever it was, he sounded distressed about something happening, having me hear that I was getting closer and it was starting to scare me. I almost felt like there was a warning going off in my head, a bad warning now as I was taking more and more steps towards the destination that I didn't even know where it was. Finally, there was an opening there and I peered around the corner, seeing a vast opening into a large room and it made me so small, small and high up against the wall there now as I was peering around to see where I was. But it still felt off, something within my chest was hurting other than my wound.

Something was beyond wrong.

"Yes, anything." I knew that voice, it made my heart jump out of my throat now as I panicked and looked around to see where it was coming from. Why was he there, who was he talking to? What was going on now? I finally found where it was coming from, having me grasp the railing there and peer down and see a walkway in the middle of a large gap into nothingness, two people were there and attaching each other. There was only one ray of light coming from the left, having me look briefly over to see both Finn and Rey, on the same level as me, but near the opening then and the light beaming past them into the darkness below. I had to look back to see who it was there on that small bridge, making me stomach turn when I knew who it was, right tin time to hear a lightsaber expand and a gasp out loud in the air. My heart broke and I felt like the floor below me broke beneath my feet. Chewbacca cried out in pain, but I was silent.

My father, being stabbed through the heart by a saber, by a man in black.

"Thank you," The man said to my father, who was gasping for his last breath of air and I was clutching the railing like I was holding on for dear life. it was too much for me, and it felt like my whole world was being blasted into a thousand pieces and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I just watched my own father being killed, and all I could do was stand there, having the sense of sadness overwhelm me and the tears were pouring from my eyes then.

"NO!" Rey screamed as my father finally was released from the saber and he fell into the pit below, having me watch him fall with watery eyes and then feeling all of that pain I was feeling within my chest and in my heart explode. Chewbacca was still crying out in pain, finally shooting out one with his blaster and hitting the man in black on his side. The man fell to his knees, looking up at Finn and Rey now as I was no longer able to hold it in, what I was feeling and what was soaring through me like an electric current.

I screamed too, shutting my eyes in defeat and my voice was echoing through the large room. But it wasn't just my voice that was shaking the room, sparks of electricity were shooting out from the lights like they were about to burst and explode. My mind, though, was on though I just witnessed the death of my father and it was killing me, consuming me from the inside out and it was all that I feared for me to feel in that moment of time.

My father was gone.

I finally opened my eyes, hearing the explosions around me now as I noticed Chewbacca, within his own rage, hitting the detonator and the room was going up in flames. The plan was still in motion, and all I could do was try and make it to the opening where Finn and Rey fled. I had to get out of there though I was still in mourning now from seeing my father die in front of me, I had to leave. My heart was feeling like it was full of lead, my head was in a daze as I made it out into the cold once more and there was no more light.

Darkness was around us.

I tried to find the right direction of where I had to go to get to Rey and Finn, trekking through the snow then and feeling both the pain of the wound and the more intense pain of my heart getting to me now as I was trying to get through with the last ounce of energy and strength I had left. I never felt this much pain within myself then, and I only wished that this was all a sick dream, a badly twisted dream that I was going to make up from.

I was about to reach the edge of the forest when something shut down my body, freezing me there within my spot there and I grunted out, trying to once again get myself out of the hold that something, or someone, had over me. The Force was heavy on me, and even though I had tears streaked cheeks and my side was on fire now, I was stuck there since it was impossible for me to move now.

Someone was holding me there.

"I thought all the Jedi were dead," I heard behind me the voice of the man who killed my father and It made me cringe and he was slowly making me turn around in midair, in the snow, to face him. I was not ready for this, not ready those see the killer and see his face. But it was when I turned to face him, seeing him finally in the face that it once again made me lose my breath. I knew that face, I knew those eyes and it yet didn't make sense at all to me. All of those memories of the past and what happened then, seeing him within my mind and hearing his voice in my head. It all came back within seconds, hitting me like a wall.

"Ben?" I asked, not believing it to be true. After I said it, the Force that was over me left me, having me fall to the floor out cold and without conscious left it all.

Darkness came over me.


	12. Chapter 12

_I felt like I was in some kind of dream, going in and out and from one place to another. I didn't know what was going on around me because all I could see was my father's face. His smile, how it made me feel warm all over again like he hasn't left and was with me in years. It felt like a phase like I had an out of body experience. I could see everything happening in front of me, almost in a tilt now as more and more voices were coming in and out of my head._

" _It's too much for him, Leia. He's leaning more towards the Dark Side than I thought before."_

 _I could see my Uncle Luke and my mother talking each other, looking grave and speaking about my brother while I was watching in the middle of them though they could not see me at all. it was like I was a ghost, seeing it all pay out in front of me, and this had to have been when I was fifteen years old, maybe younger than that._

" _This is what I feared, Ben being more like Vader than anything," My mother said in almost a sorrowful tone, a tear in her eye now as she was talking about my brother._

" _I worry about how he was handling himself against the others. He's more hostile, more on the edge with his training than anything," Uncle Luke explained to her as he was folding his hands in front of him now, "The only one that he's not hostile to is Neyli."_

" _He's always been protective of her, too protective." My mother voiced to him now but having me see things fade out like I was going out of my own consciousness again now. Everything was shifting again like I wasn't on solid ground and the wind was picking up around me now, but I found myself in another new place, darker and more secluded. It didn't feel right, where I was and how it felt around me then._

 _I saw a young man, a mere teenager with a red saber, striking at the last youngling in a large room and having me see the youngling fall to the floor now. It scared me, see the same red lightsaber that I saw in the forest being held by this teenager and seeing the rage there, the darkness and the hate within those eyes as he was now looking around himself, to find another person to maybe find and kill now._

 _I watched to see if I knew who it was, those same eyes that I knew were my brother's and the same face, but it was different. It was far deadlier and sinister, not one ounce of warmth was along his skin or there in his stance. His look was determined and rigid, and I could hear him call out one name that gave me an instant shiver down my spine in my spot as a ghost within this apparent memory._

" _Neyli!"_

 _There as one more memory that came thought, having me see another scene of this trip down memory lane and it was of myself, sprawled out on a table at the age of fifteen, out cold from something that happened to me. I could tell, from the amount of debris around the scene and how I could see intense damage within that room, that it was within the training room of the Jedi Temple, or what used to be the Jedi Temple._

 _It was in bits and pieces now, like a huge battle came through and it was now showing the aftermath. I was out cold on the same table that I chose my Kyber Crystal some years before, the same table that I would use my technique of the Force, but now it looked like I was barely breathing there and Uncle Luke was near my head. I saw it in his eyes, the soot and grime there and he too went through something there at the Temple, having me really wonder what was going on as he placed his hands on either side and he looked like he was about to be in tears now._

" _I have to erase her memory," I could hear him say in almost a broken manner, more like on the brink of despair was there in his voice now as he closed his eyes, "She can't know what happened to Ben."_

 _I wanted to call out to him, to see him that broken and that distant, it did not sound like how I remembered him when I was younger. I wanted him to stop, to explain what was going on and how it was both not making sense and making total sense all at the same time. But I found no voice within me, like my vocal chords, was shut off within seconds._

 _It was all dark again._

* * *

Slowly, I was opening my eyes and I was hearing heart monitor next to me, going nice and steady and slow. I had a blink a few times, the light as blinding me almost in an unpleasant way now as I was seeing a huge light above me and it was making me squint. I had something attached my arm, like a needle that was feeding me medicine as my other hand on my right side, was being occupied by something warm and calloused. I had a blanket on over my body near my upper chest down, I was wearing what I could feel to be a shirt and short underneath, but I then felt something secured to my hip, right where the wound was.

Oh God, it was all coming back to me within a second.

The wound on my hip, how I felt like I was going to pass out from all of the pain, me using The Force, seeing my father die in front of me. Oh God, my own father…he was no longer there. I could no longer say it was a dream, it felt so real how my own heart broke and my own mind was going haywire. I could see it over and over within my head, Han Solo falling over the small bridge and into nothingness, me seeing the saber piercing him through the chest and his eyes wide. It felt like a knife was piercing me too when I saw it happen to him, and yet here I was. I was alive, and he was dead.

My father was dead.

I finally was starting to realize where I was: the medical ward in the hanger. I knew it was the medical ward from plenty of injuries and fall backs when I was training, but this was different. I wasn't in the common medical ward, where they would hold and treat the regular pilots. This was a quarantine kind of ward, a private room that was hardly used unless it was for a serious situation. The blankets felt soothing against me, but the wound there against my side was still healing and it had the same aching that I remembered from when I was on the planet there, with every breath another around of aching was felt and experienced. My hair felt plastered there under my neck, a braid was felt there to either move away from my eyes and get out of the way. I wondered what the hell was going on and why I was there on a bed, seeing my brother's face in front of me, to thinking it was my brother's face.

Then I felt my hand move, or what was in my hand.

It made me move my head slightly in that direction, my neck stiff from being still for so long there and I saw what was holding my hand there, but it was more like who. Hunched over, head against the bed near my leg and his breathing showed it was even and deep, was none other than Poe. He was fast asleep, head facing me and I felt my own heart breaking again. I haven't seen him since we left for StarKiller since we were starting this new mission that could save us all. But there he was, holding my hand gently with him own like I was so delicate to him. I could see in how he was still sitting in the chair, leaning against my bed there and having my feel the set of heaviness there along his shoulders and head, he's been at my bedside for a long while now.

For some reason, even with me being there on the bed and going trough hell and back, and seeing things that I wish I could erase from my mind, I was slowly feeling a small sense of relief there on my face. I was no longer in danger, the walls within myself that I knew I was building up was still trying to build up more and more now and not want to fall down around me. I had to think positive, to think more on the plus side that I was alive and I got by with the mere skinning of my teeth. Seeing Poe there in front of me was a small sense of happiness there, only a very mere flicker of happiness compared to the sadness and despair that I was still harboring and coiling up inside.

I squeezed his hand, without any realization behind it, and I heard him inhale sharply while he was waking up. He shot his head up, blinking a few times to get the sleep out of his eyes and then he looked away from me, not seeing me, at first, wide awake and looking at him and I watching him as he blinked a few times, as if he fell asleep and woke him up plenty of times before. He looked scuffed up like he has been here for days and days on end and nothing moved him out of the room.

His hair was disheveled, his eyes were a bit bloodshot, scruff was there on his face, even his clothes looked wrinkled and messed up. This was a side of him that I have never seen before since I was used to seeing him always cleaned up and looking professional as one of the best pilots of the Resistance. This was not a side of him I have ever seen, looking afraid and out of place. He was still holding my hand, and he was looking at my heart monitor, maybe in hopes that something changed.

"Poe," I finally said to him in a raspy tone, seeing him look back at me within seconds with wide eyes of shock and silence. We were staring at each other, me in the bed and Poe next to me in his chair, his look was of pure shock and fear there as he was holding my hand a little more tightly now. Was he trying to see if this was a dream? Was he thinking his mind was tricked? But I stared right back at him now, now seeing a single tear coming from his eye.

I haver never seen him cry, not even when hr was missing his father or mother from time to time, he never once cried in front of me. But I saw the tear, going down his cheek onto his chin now as he breathed out slowly through his mouth as like he was letting this sink in.

Finally, he leaned over to me to press his lips to my forehead, his other hand that was not holding my own went into my hair to lace his fingers there against my locks and I felt him trembling against my forehead with his lips and fingers. It was real, he was there and I was alive.

"Neyli-Organa Solo, you scared me," He said into my skin with such a broken tone that it was killing me see him like this. I just sat there, trying to breathe myself all over again now as that wall that I felt was so strong to keep up, was slowly deteriorating and coming down from all I was feeling. When Poe pulled away from my head to look right at me, having me seeing him and finally feel the sadness buried within me come back over me like a blanket to cover me from the light. Those eyes, the same ones that were warm and kind and loving, were filled with sadness and despair. I knew why, he didn't have to say it as I felt more tears piercing my eyes and I closed them in defeat.

He knew. He knew about Han.

"Neyli..." He tried to pull be back, to get me to where he was in the room, but I was far gone. My father, his face in my head and the knowledge that he was no longer alive was killing me. The was were crumbling, the sense of togetherness that I thought I had been no more. I felt unhinged, I felt raw, and I felt it all over me now as I was shaking then in the bed. Poe was still calling my name, but I was still thinking about how I had no more father. He was gone, and there would be no more promise of time together, or moments to fly together in the sky.

It was shattered.

The lights in my room were blazing now, getting brighter and brother with more and more sadness and rage seeping through me. I was no longer in control of my own link to The Force since it was showing in my emotions then that I was beyond sad, angry, and confused as to why my father had to be the one who died. I screamed, Poe wrapped his one arm around me to hold me back to the bed now as I screamed into the room and the light were popping out, one by one now as I was letting out the pain I was feeling and willing to bottle up. I wanted my father back, I needed my father back. It was not fair in the slightest as I heard running steps coming over to our room and the door opening.

"Sshhhh, I have you, Neyli. I won't let you go, I have you," Poe said to desperately to me now as I was no longer screaming but sobbing there within his arms, leaning against him now as I was feeling number than anything.

"What happened? The backup generator for the medical wing had to be kicked in—"It was my mother, but she stopped when she saw me. I was crying into my boyfriend's arms, who was holding me close to him and keeping me safe there in the bed. Such a sigh for my mother to see, her daughter who was nearly dead weeping in the arms of her best pilots because of the death of her father. Nothing made sense to me anymore, nothing at all now as I was just getting the pain I was feeling out of my system before it was going to be worse.

"Give them some room," I heard my mother say out loud in a low tone.

"We need to check her vitals and run some tests." I heard one of the medical droids say to her as I felt Poe kiss my hair again in a loving way now.

"Do them later."

"But, General Organa—"

"I said, do it later." My mother was trying to help me, give me some time to breathe and mourn what happened to me. I could tell in her own tone, that she was mourning too.

At least, I wasn't the only one.

* * *

"Where's Finn and Rey?" I asked Poe now, back in my bed and he was sitting next to me again, still holding my hand was refusing to leave me side for the time being. After my mother told the rest of the medical staff to give both Poe and myself some space, I collected myself again and was running on empty from the extensive use of The Force that I inflicted on my room. I felt a bit embarrassed on how I handled it, but then again it could be worse.

"Finn suffered from a lightsaber wound, by the Jedi who was trying to stop them both from leaving," Poe explained to me softly then, his eyes looking bit more hesitant when he mentioned his friend being hurt, "He's recovering in his own room down the hall."

"And Rey?"

"She left with Chewbacca and your Uncle Luke's old droid: R2-D2. He had the last piece of the map to find him, Neyli. She went to go find him," I wanted to be happy, to hear that my Uncle was going to be found once and for all, that we found all that we were looking for and we were going to have a happy life. But no happiness was left in me, not anymore. It was robbed of me, as bad as it sounded. I wanted to be happy, I really did. I tried to smile to show that I was happy to hear the news, but the smile itself looked faker than anything then and I knew Poe could see it. He squeezed my hand in reassurance then, noticing the pain there on my face.

"Does it go away?" I asked him out of the blue, seeing him look at me with a knitted look of confusion.

"Does what go away?" He asked, having me look at him dead in the eyes. I had to ask him, as selfish as it was going to sound coming out of my mouth, I had to know since I was new at this kind of pain and loss within myself.

"The pain…after losing your dad?" I asked him in almost a sheepish and cowardly way. How foolish and mean was I to asked him that, when I knew he would miss both his mother and father from time to time, To him, it was still a wound that was opened and was never going to be closed, and here I as rubbing salt in the wound. I was expecting him to look at me dead in the eyes and hate me from bringing up his own father, I was ready to be yelled at, or, at least, see him storm out and never see me again.

But he scanned my eyes for a moment or two, and he did the opposite. He leaned over to press his lips on my own then and holding it there for me to feel it down to my bones. I held it too, not wanting to lose that small spark within that kiss that was trying so hard to bring me back to the light again. Poe was trying to do that for me, to get me out of the darkness and back to the light at I used to inhabit constantly.

He pulled away from me, the both of us inches apart from each other as he looked at me dead in the eyes and nodded his head.

"It's not permanent, but I know you can survive it," He said to me. He was right: this was going to come and go when it felt like doing so. I was not going to sulk forever in this, I was going to rise up from it again and move on in my life. Even while I was still tender in that moment in the medical ward bed, in the arms of a man whom I knew I loved with my whole heart, I had to believe that this pain was not going to stay with me forever. I then thought of the other part of the pain that I was feeling, the other factor that was going into this and it made me freeze up and become tense there in the bed.

'What is it?" Poe asked me, looking a bit concerned at me now inc I was looking white as a sheet than before. I saw his face in my head again, the face I haven't seen in over a decade and I thought was lost forever. But he was there, and he was still alive.

"The Jedi…" I said to Poe, looking at him dead in the eye with worry and fear, "It was Ben."

My brother...was Kylo Ren.


	13. Chapter 13

I was standing up, Poe right next to me as we were both looking at Finn, whom was still unconscious and was resting in his own bed at the moment as I was leaning most of my weight against Poe now as we were watching him breathe in and out there. I was showing on the outside that I was slowly getting better, the scabs were scars and the wound on my hip was having its own scar to show. But inside, I was still hurting.

Hurting and fuming.

I have yet to talk to my mother about what happened in my past, who I realized who my brother was and that he was still alive. It seemed too much for me, and after finding out about it. I wanted to find the time to talk to my mother about it. I had too many emotions running through me at one time, shock, anger, betrayal, confusion, loss, and most of all, fear. I was afraid to think that it was true, to think that those visions that I had in my head really did happen and were blocked from me. To think, my own Uncle and old master was the one who took away my memories of what happened to my brother. it gave me one question in my head.

Why?

"Come on, we should take you back to your room," Poe said to me in a low tone now as I was still looking down at Finn. I wanted to see him and make sure he was alright, hearing that he was still healing from the back injury that included a saber. It looked bad, that's what Poe told me when thy brought him back to the base, but he was still alive and still breathing. I only hoped that he would wake up sometime soon so I would know for certain that he was alright. But it then made me think of Rey, how she was off with Chewbacca to find my Uncle and make sure he was still alive, wherever she was. I wanted to go with her, to find my Uncle myself and see him face to face.

"He's getting better, isn't he?" I asked Poe in a hopeful tone, having me see him nod his head as he too looked back at his friend. I could tell he was worried about Finn too, wondering if he was going to be okay and awake anytime soon. They were friends after all, and they helped each other some time ago.

"Yeah, he's getting better," Poe said to me in reassurance then as we both turned around, our arms linked together and my weight back on him, I turned around to see my mother, standing there at the doorway into the room. Both Poe and I froze there, having me see my mother watching me with the same kind of look that she would give to show that she wanted to have a talk with me. I stared right back at her, my voice in my throat and my heart still feeling too tender to say anything to her. I thought back to my Uncle and what he did to me and my memories, and it made me really wonder if my mother had something to do with it. Did she know what he did? Did she help? Does she even know about Ben and that he is still alive? I wanted to ask her all those things at once, but I also felt spent and no ounce of energy was back in me again.

"Neyli…" My mother started, trying to make it sound so soft to me then but I instantly shook my head.

"I don't want to talk to you," I said to her too shortly, Poe clutching my hand in his now as he heard he almost snap at my mother. I could feel the anger coming over me again, the anger of now finding out what happened to my brother and all, this time, being in the dark. The anger of losing my father right in front of me eyes, the anger of not being good or strong enough to protect him, and the anger of missing my brother for far too long. My mother saw it in my face as I took in a shaky breath, rethinking on how I was trying to handle this before I spoke one more time.

"I don't want to do it here, General." I said to her in a softer tone, but it was still bitter on the end of it now as she slowly saw what I was saying to her beneath the lines. We had to talk, without a whole lot of people to see or hear what we were talking about. She nodded in agreement, her hands behind her back now as she took in her own breath.

"We'll talk in your room, just the both of us," She said to me now, about to move out of the room to give me more space until I spoke up again.

"Poe is not leaving my side," I said to her in a bold manner, my mother giving me a look to make sure what I was saying was correct. If I was going to talk to her, I didn't want to do it by myself. I felt like I needed someone else there with me in case something does happen, and I trusted Poe with my whole life. He knew what I was feeling, a solid sense of what was going on, and he was not going to be something that would betray me or leave me with someone like this. Plus, I knew how Poe was protective of me from time to time, especially now. My mother, reluctantly, nodded in agreement and moved out of the room now as Poe looked at me with a hint of fear in his eyes.

"I don't have to be in there if you don't want me to be," he said in a calm tone, sense that it was a bit awkward there between my mother and I. He didn't want to intrude, I could tell in the hesitance there in his tone and how he looked at me. But I shook my head, I needed my support there in front of my mother.

"I want you there with me," I said to him, squeezing our fingers together and pouring my eyes into his, "Right now, you're the only person I can trust in this own base." It pained me to tell him that, but after all, that happened I knew it was the fact more than fiction. No one else was as loyal to me up to this point than Poe himself. My mother, in my own heart, had some explaining to do since I could tell she knew something about Ben that was having me look at her in a different light. It felt a sting of pain was there on his own face too when I said it, but I knew I had to tell him since he's the only one who hasn't broken my heart yet.

"Okay," He replied, nodding at me now and having me give him a small smile then, reaching over to kiss my forehead once more before we both started walking out of Finn's room. I didn't follow him, though, seeing him walk ahead but stop since we were still holding hands. He looked back at me with a curious look his eye as to what was going on. This had to be the worst time to tell him what was on my heart, or what I've been wanting to tell him for such a long time, But it felt like no better time for me to tell him the phrase that I never thought I would tell another person outside my own family.

"I love you,"

It was as scary as the first time I flew an X-Wing, or even went on my first mission. Not to mention how this was my best friend I was telling this to him. I knew we care for each other, that we would do anything for each other, and we would confine with one another. He was my better half at this point, and the only real thing holding me together as of late. But he smiled at me, a warm smile that reminded me of the smile that we would she with one another in secret, or the smile he gave before he kissed me for the first time under the Force-Sensitive Tree. It made me feel a small bit of happy again when I saw the smile there on his face, and his hold on my hand was gentle and caring instead of protective and almost firm. It might have been the most unusual time for me to tell him, and I was always wondering when I would tell him, or if he would tell me first. Safe to say I had to be the first tone after all. He walked over to me then, standing near me to look at me up and down with my healing face and still shattered heart.

"I love you too," he replied back to me like it was natural for him to say it, but to me. It was like things around me were frozen and standing still there between the both of us. From the first time I met Poe so many years ago, I didn't think that we would be in a relationship like this. Sometimes I would still think it was too good to be true. I had Poe to keep me in the light of the things that were crumbling around me now, within that small sliver of a moment that we had together there in the room.

"Come on," I said to him in a lighter but small manner. He grinned and we started to walk together hand it hand, having me take another deep breath and not to know what to expect or what was going to come ahead of me now. It felt more like I was about to go on a new battle, but now with my X-Wing.

A battle with my mother.

* * *

"I should have told you this, a long time ago after it happened," My mother had to start with that sentence with me as we were once again back in my room, having me sit on the bed there and Poe next to me. This time, I was sitting Indian Style there in front of my mother, who was standing at the foot of the bed and C-3PO was in the corner to record and analyze the conversation for my sake of my mother. I was willing to hash how any kind of awkwardness that we were going to have there between us. My mother knew it too, and we had to talk about this now.

"The older you and your brother were getting while you were training with your Uncle, the more of the Dark side we could see in your brother," MY mother started explaining to me and I was watching her with my eyes, trying to keep an open mind about it and what she had to say about my twin, "We've known him to have the tendencies to be more towards the Dark Side, even when you two were young and still learning. But it was getting worse, less stable for him as you two got older and were gaining your skills with you Uncle. Both your father and I got concerned for him, very concerned since we saw….we saw your grandfather in him."

"What about me?" I asked her, more curious than anything since I was hearing how my brother was more prone to The Dark Side than me. Was there an ounce of it in me that they were worried about? Did they see it in me and not tell me about it? Poe instinctively reached over and laced our fingers together, resting our joined hands on my knee there and having me see the look of worry there on his face as he was watching me see how I was going to react to my mother. I wanted to know, I wanted to really know if they were at one time afraid of me like they were afraid of my brother. But my mother shook her head at me now, having me see the small amount of love she had there for me.

"With you, Neyli, we saw the opposite," My mother said to me with a bit more warmth in her tone compared to when she was talking about Ben, "You had more of the Light within you, much more than what we have anticipated. Even your Uncle Luke saw no ounce of the Dark Side within you, you and Ben were on opposite ends when it came to The Force and what was within you." I wanted to feel better about what I heard about myself, I wanted to be more satisfied to know there was none of the Dark Side within me. But then again, I was still thinking about Ben and how I was too blind to see him going off the deep end when we were training together.

"So what happened with him?" I asked her now, wanting to know more about Ben and try to place the spices together within my head as to what went wrong and what went south real quick. My mother, once again trying to think of what to say to me then, looked a bit more grave before she told me the story.

"Right before your sixteenth birthday, Ben was pushed over to the edge. He was in talks with Supreme Leader Snoke, someone who had a large influence from The Dark Side. He was seducing Ben, trying to bring him over to the Dark Side with talk of power, talk of being the most powerful Jedi in the galaxy. Your brother believed him, and he turned on your Uncle and the others that were training under him." I could see it was hard for my mother to tell me this like she had to relive this moment and story all over again now as she was voicing it. I felt bad for her, but I still had to hear it from her since she never once thought of telling me this before.

"He killed all of them, every single Jedi that was training there at your Uncle's temple, which left you to be the last one standing there," She explained to me, already having em feel that this was going to be a turn for the worst with this conversation, "You have to understand one thing about your brother, Neyli. Ben was never one to hurt you, not one time has he raised a finger at you or looked at you wrong. He wasn't even going to hurt you then after he killed the others in the Temple." I was squeezing Poe's hand there and feel a bit more sad to hear what happened in the past.

"You defended yourself against him, tried to persuade him to not be with Supreme Leader Snoke and to stay with you and Uncle Luke. He wouldn't listen, and the only thing you thought of doing that moment between each other, was to duel him," I tried to picture it in my head, using my saber against my own brother since I saw him so far in the Dark that it would be impossible to just talk to him and get him to come back with my words. But it also didn't seem like me at all, how I would raise my own saber against him and he would do the same for me.

"You got injured in the process, and Ben thought he killed you," My mother explained to me softly then, linking her fingers together in front of herself and I saw how she was clutching them tightly to keep going with the story, "That was what tipped him over the edge, the thought that he murdered you after you got injured and was not responding. Your Uncle got the both of you under his control then, having no choice…but to wipe both of you memories."

"He wiped our memories?" I asked, repeating the statement.

"Both of yours, yes," It was like led hitting my brain and king it hard for me to wrap my own brain around it, "He made the both of your believe that the other died, making Ben believed that you died…"

"And for me to believe that Ben died," I whispered to her, letting it sink and see the circle that was coming back around and making a little bit more sense. They didn't want us to find the other, or know that the other was alive. It was both confusing and making sense at the same time, how I thought my brother died and it was still hanging over my head.

"Your Uncle Luke didn't want Ben to find you, find you and hurt you. He was afraid of what he would do to you now that he is consumed by the Dark Side. You were going to be his next target to get back at your Uncle, and you had to be protected," My mother explained to me and I tried to think of my brother, my own twin that I was so close to growing up, was the same brother that wanted to kill me because of the Darkness consuming him. It didn't seem right, for him to kill me or, at least, want to kill me. It sounded like a piece of the puzzle was left out for me to try and decide.

"But this whole time, you kept it from me…" I said to her now, almost getting bitter again about all that happened to me and feeling it once again come over me as I glared at my mother, "You were worried about Ben, but you were worried about me too?"

"I wanted to protect you, Neyli.." My mother tried to say to me in her calm tone, but this time, I shook my head at her.

"You were worried I was going to want to kill him too? Or go and find him and get myself killed," I said as more of a statement than anything.

"No," My mother countered back with me, having me feel my spare hand that was not occupied by Poe's hand digging into the sheets under my fingers to just ground myself there, "You were never safe since that happened to the both of you."

"But you made me think that I lost my brother," I said back to her, really trying to not yell at her and feel that pain swallows me up again. I had to let this sink in, really sink in and know that no matter how I felt about this, I had to be calm. If I knew one thing about the Dark Side, it was that anger and hate can lead a sane person o the Dark Side. The feed of hate and fear, sadness and despair, it was all a path that one can try and avoid, and if they don't, it would be too late. It might be too late for my brother Ben, but I was thinking that it would be a bad idea for me to go down the same path. I had ever right to be angry, but I couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't be angry and let it go over me and take me to another place that I would never want to go.

"Can I just….Can I have a few minutes alone, please?" I asked her in an almost a pleading manner, thinking that I had to be alone within my own thoughts and now lash out at her. I was still pissed at her for not telling me about my brother, for hiding that from me. Yet I remembered my Uncle, yet again with his plenty of teachings for me, and how he told me to harness my emotions and not have them get the best of me. My mother was watching me with sadness there on her face then, and she nodded in agreement before moving out of the room, having me finally pushing the palm of my hand into my eyes to concentrate there.

It was still too much.

"That could have been worse." I looked up and over at Poe now, seeing him eye me and I cocked my own eyebrow at him since I had no idea why he said that.

"How?" I asked, seeing him shrug his shoulders.

"You two would have had a screaming match, that or you would have chewed her out," He replied to her, having me slowly fix that under my skin and then break out into a small smile from there. It was true, I could have yelled and screamed at her, or the both of us screaming at each other. Poe grinned back at me, moving my hair from my face and fixing his hand on my neck near my collarbone to rest it there and have me feel the heat of his hand against my skin.

"Sorry you had to hear that, and see that," I muttered at him, but he wasn't showing it in his face.

"Don't be sorry, family drama is always the worst," Poe said to me in a helpful way, and it made me give him a small smile there in front of him. Even with this whole new discovery of what happened to my brother, how he was still alive and we both were tricked into thinking that other was dead, Poe was trying to keep me within the light and within the peacefulness of this chaotic situation. I was still not convinced I deserved him, and this was a clear example since any other person would try and run for the hills.

"I really don't deserve you, Poe Dameron," I said to him in an honest kind of manner, still smirking at him because I could never find myself to be mad or angry at him.

"Well, I'm staying with you because I love you," He explained in a careful manner, "And if I were in your position, I wouldn't want to be alone. So I'm not leaving you alone with this," I leaned my head against his hand that was still touching me, finding it to be a soothing touch and a kind touch when everything else around me was crumbling apart. He was part of the way I was going to find peace, the faith he had in me and the determination to make sure I was not going to become part of the Dark Side. I loved him, more than life itself.

It was time to go on.


	14. Note!

Sooo. Since the new movie just came back…should I lace a new story?Let me Know!


	15. Sequel!

Sooo. I did it! I started writing the story!

Here's the link to the new story!

s/12765775/1/Keep-The-Light


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